Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The information partains to the figure of jobs in different 4 areas of the economy sach as manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020 is illustrated by the line chart.
From an overall assessment, the maximum number of jobs in sectors of di economy had been obsearved in the retail and healthcare;however, the minimum number was noted in the agriculcure.
on a keener analysis, redarding, the figure of jobs in sector of economy in US was noted in the manufacturing, it stood at 15millions in 1960. Then it increased sharply to 20millions in 1980 .Afterthat, it decreased significantly over 2 years from 17millions in 2000 to 13millions in 2020. Moving to retails, there was escalated rapidly between 6 million in 1960 and 16 millions in 2020.
In agriculture,it accounted for 3millions, 11millions, and 16millions in 1960,2000 and 2020. Lastly, the number of jobs in helthcare sectore was decreased slightly to 6millions in 1960 frome 3millions in 1980. Then, it remained same in next three years( around 2millions )
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The student attempts to address the task by reporting information about the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, the student states that agriculture accounted for 3 millions, 11 millions, and 16 millions in 1960, 2000 and 2020, whereas the chart shows agriculture declining from 6 million down to 2 million. Furthermore, the description of healthcare has data points and trends reversed or confused with other sectors. The overview is also contradictory and inaccurate regarding the overall numbers of jobs in the sectors. Due to these frequent misinterpretations of the visual data, the response falls into the Band 4 category for Task Achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The response has an organisational structure with an introductory paragraph, an overview attempt, and body paragraphs. However, logical progression is severely disrupted by confusing sequencing and faulty referencing. Sentences frequently lack clear logical connections, and cohesive devices are misused or absent. For example, transitional phrases like 'Afterthat' and 'On a keener analysis' are awkwardly deployed, and paragraphing is poorly handled with broken, disjointed sentences. The overall arrangement fails to provide a smooth, coherent reading experience, aligning best with Band 4 descriptors.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
Vocabulary usage is basic, repetitive, and heavily flawed. There are numerous spelling mistakes ('partains', 'sach', 'di', 'obsearved', 'agriculcure', 'redarding', 'retails', 'helthcare', 'sectore', 'frome') and incorrect word choices that significantly strain the reader. While the student attempts to use topic-related vocabulary such as 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare', the high frequency of lexical errors and inability to use less common vocabulary accurately place this response at Band 4.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The student demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences with frequent structural failures. There are persistent, major errors in punctuation, subject-verb agreement, tense usage, and prepositions throughout the text (e.g., 'there was escalated rapidly', 'was decreased slightly... to 6millions in 1960 frome 3millions in 1980'). These errors are frequent, distort meaning, and cause significant difficulty for the reader, which corresponds to the Band 4 descriptors for grammar.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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