Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given line graphs illustrate the infromation about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US year from 1960 to 2020. The data has been measured in millions.

To begin with, in 1960 economy of agriculture was recoded around 5 million and decreased in 2020.Retail is around the 5 million and go up to 15 million in 2020. Healthcare is around the 2 million in 1960 and go up to 15 million in 2020,and manyfacturing is 15 million in 1960 & grew to 20 million in 1980 and dcreased the roundabout 12 million in 2020.

Moreover, agriculture is many low cost in million in 1960 to 2020 and Healthcare is more than grew up in 1960 to 2020 in aroundabout is 15 million that is more increased in this graphs and retail and manyfacturing is similar in this graphs. in this graphs increased in 5 million difference.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to describe the main trends across the four economic sectors, noting figures for manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare between 1960 and 2020. However, the data presentation contains notable inaccuracies and vague approximations. For example, the student states that the economy of agriculture was recorded around 5 million in 1960, whereas the chart shows it starting at 6 million, and later claims that retail and manufacturing are similar, which misinterprets the distinct trends shown in the graph. The overview is weak and lacks a clear summary of the overall trends, while the body paragraphs suffer from underdeveloped comparisons and data confusion. Consequently, the response addresses the task only partially, aligning with Band 5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The text is divided into three paragraphs, including an introduction and two body paragraphs. However, overall progression is hindered by poor logical sequencing and confusing transitions. Phrases like 'To begin with' and 'Moreover' are used mechanically rather than to build a coherent argument or structure the data logically. Referencing is frequently unclear, and sentences often lack cohesive ties with one another, creating a disjointed reading experience. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal structure of the paragraphs is muddled, reflecting features of Band 4 to 5.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The lexical range is very limited and repetitive, relying on basic vocabulary such as 'jobs', 'economy', 'sectors', 'decrease', and 'increase'. There are numerous spelling errors and incorrect word choices throughout the text, including 'infromation', 'recoded' instead of 'recorded', 'manyfacturing', and awkward phrasings like 'many low cost in million'. These lexical limitations and frequent inaccuracies cause noticeable difficulty for the reader and occasionally impede communication, placing the response firmly at Band 4.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most sentences are simple or attempt complex forms that turn out faulty, messy, or ungrammatical, such as 'Healthcare is more than grew up in 1960 to 2020 in aroundabout is 15 million that is more increased in this graphs'. There are frequent errors in verb tense, prepositions, and sentence construction, which frequently distort meaning and hinder understanding. Punctuation is also erratic. These persistent structural errors place the performance within Band 4.

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