Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line graph compares four major sectors contributing to the United States job market from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, manufacturing was the major, retail and agriculture were minor, and healthcare was the least employer in 1960, but over the years, manufacturing and agriculture dropped their share in the job market, and retail and healthcare became the largest contributors by creating around 16 millions jobs each.

Initially, manufacturing held the top position for employemnet generating in the US economy from 1960 to 1980 by creating 20 million jobs in 1980, but it started to sharply reduce its share in the market and came to the third position by creating around 13 millions jobs in 2020.

Moreover, healthcare was the least contributing sector in the employement market in 1960, which became one of the largest contributors in 2020. Also, the agriculture sector along with the retail was creating around 6 million jobs in 1960, but it plummeted badly and became the least contributor in the job market in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The student covers all parts of the task well, providing an overview and selecting the main features and trends of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. The key statistics are reported accurately, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 before dropping to 13 million, and retail and healthcare rising to around 16 million each by 2020. The overview effectively captures the major shifts, noting how retail and healthcare surpassed manufacturing and agriculture. However, there are minor awkward phrasings in the overview, such as calling healthcare 'the least employer', but overall, the task is successfully and comprehensively addressed, aligning well with the Band 7 requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is organized into a clear introductory sentence, an overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs detailing the specific trends. Information and ideas are logically sequenced, moving from general trends to specific sector developments. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Initially', 'Moreover', and 'Also' are used to guide the reader through the data, although some transitions feel slightly mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the detailed body points. Referencing is generally clear, though minor improvements in linking phrases would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate to good range of vocabulary suitable for an academic task, successfully employing terms like 'contributing sector', 'plummeted badly', and 'dropped their share'. However, there are noticeable lexical and collocation errors, such as 'least employer' instead of 'sector with the fewest employees', 'employemnet generating' (spelling and phrasing error), and '16 millions jobs' (unnecessary plural on millions). Despite these occasional slips and awkward word choices, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning without impeding communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writing exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses, such as 'which became one of the largest contributors in 2020'. There are several grammatical errors and typos present, including 'employemnet' and pluralization issues ('16 millions jobs'), as well as minor awkwardness in preposition use. However, these errors do not impede communication, and the majority of simple sentences are accurate, while complex structures show good underlying control. This places the performance comfortably at Band 6.

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