Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The graph indecates deta of four economy sector in US about the job market between 1960 to 2020.
The graph shows four econmy sector's job markets during the 60 years. Four sectors are manufacturing ,Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare. In the deparment of manufacturing the jobs increased in first twenty years then constantly decreased in other department retail the jobs firstly increased and in the last job increased with very minnar deffrence. In the sector of agriculture the jobs are decreased in overall period firstly rapidly decreased then slowly decreased. In the last department jobs in all over the time rised in first time period slowly as compare to last period.
The jobs are increased in manufacturing department in start increased very fastly in twenty years reached at twenty millions and then overall period decreased the jobs. In other department the retail markets jobs are rised all over the time which reached at around sixteen million in sixty years.
Other deparment like agriculture the jobs are increased at maximum level around sixteen million which is equalance of retail markets and in the last in healthcare department the jobs are constantly decreased all over the time which falls at around two million its only one department which jobs market are lowest as compare to all others.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response attempts to cover all four sectors mentioned in the prompt (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare). However, there are significant inaccuracies in reporting the data. For instance, the student states that healthcare jobs constantly decreased and fell to around two million, whereas the graph clearly shows healthcare rising significantly from 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020. Similarly, agriculture is confused in places with retail data ('around sixteen million which is equalance of retail markets'). The overview is very weak and lacks clarity. Because of these factual inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the visual data, the response falls into the Band 4 range.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The organization of the response is extremely basic and lacks logical progression. The text is divided into four short paragraphs, but ideas within them are jumbled and difficult to follow. There is a lack of clear cohesive devices; sentences are loosely strung together with repetitive phrases like 'in the last department' and 'all over the time'. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is faulty, and referencing is often unclear (e.g., pronouns and sector references become confused). This corresponds to a Band 4 level for cohesion and coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic, repetitive, and heavily flawed. There are numerous spelling mistakes ('indecates', 'deta', 'econmy', 'deparment', 'minnar', 'deffrence', 'rised', 'fastly', 'equalance') and frequent word choice errors (e.g., 'economy sector' instead of 'economic sector', 'job market' misused). The student attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'constantly decreased' and 'maximum level', but inaccuracies severely strain the reader. This performance aligns with Band 4 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The grammatical range is extremely limited, relying primarily on simple sentences with frequent attempts at complex structures that are almost entirely faulty. There are persistent errors in tense usage (e.g., 'jobs are increased', 'jobs are decreased' instead of past tense for historical data), missing articles, and incorrect prepositions. Punctuation is also weak, with run-on phrasing and lack of proper sentence boundaries. These pervasive errors cause constant difficulty for the reader and reflect a Band 4 grammar score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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