Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
According to graph information the job in healthcare department is slightly low but the number of jobs in healthcare department is increasing and reached 16 millions jobs in 2020.Furthermore,the graph shows that agriculture field jobs decreasing over year by year it is started from 5.5 millions and ended at only 2.5 millions jobs are left in 2020.
The graph shows that retail market have also better number of jobs in 1960 as compared to healthcare department furthermore, we have seen that retail market and healthcare department have same number in jobs in the market in 2020.
The manufacturing department shows some good start and growth in this graph in 1960 there are 15 millions of jobs but we have seen that the numbers in manufacture department is gradually drop after 1980 and droping down every year and ended up 13 millions jobs are left in 2020. Remember that the highest number of jobs in manufacture department is 20 millions in 1980.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The candidate attempts to report on the main features of the graph, mentioning trends in healthcare, agriculture, retail, and manufacturing. However, there are significant issues with data interpretation and task fulfillment. For instance, the opening statement includes a copied prompt sentence instead of an effective paraphrase or overview. Furthermore, some data points are inaccurate according to the visual data, such as claiming agriculture started at 5.5 million and ended at 2.5 million (the chart shows it starting at 6 million and dropping to 2 million). The response lacks a clear, cohesive overview of the major trends across the four sectors. Because of these limitations, the response falls into the Band 5 descriptor, where the task is addressed only partially and details are sometimes inaccurate or under-developed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The text is divided into paragraphs, but the logical organisation and overall progression are weak. The writer relies heavily on basic and repetitive connectors such as 'Furthermore, the graph shows that' and 'we have seen that'. Paragraphing is haphazard, with ideas lumped together rather than grouped logically by sector or trend. Reference words are sometimes vague, and the flow is frequently interrupted by choppy, run-on sentences. There is a lack of sophisticated cohesive devices, leading to a mechanical feel. This aligns closely with Band 5, where information has some organisation, but overall progression is unclear and cohesive devices are often inadequate or repetitive.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The lexical range is limited and repetitive. The writer frequently reuses basic vocabulary items such as 'jobs', 'department', 'market', and 'millions'. There are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as referring to economic sectors as 'departments' ('healthcare department', 'manufacture department') or 'fields' ('agriculture field'), which are unnatural in an economic context. Spelling and word formation errors also appear, including 'decreasing over year by year' and 'droping down'. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the basic topic, the frequent inaccuracies and lack of flexibility restrict the score to Band 5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and faulty attempts at complex clauses. There are frequent grammatical errors, including missing auxiliary verbs, incorrect tense usage, and run-on sentences joined improperly with commas (e.g., 'Furthermore,the graph shows that agriculture field jobs decreasing over year by year it is started from...'). Punctuation is weak, with missing spaces after commas and periods. These errors frequently cause strain for the reader and demonstrate poor control over complex sentence forms, placing the response firmly in Band 5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.