Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph tracks the number of jobs in four different departments of the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Manufacturing had most jobs in 1960, that gradually rose till 1980 and decreased subsequently from 1980 to 2020. Healthcare sector produced least jobs in 1960 but stood first in 2020 in producing most  jobs. Agriculture and retail sectors had same number of jobs in 1960, but agriculture jobs fell every year till 2020; whereas retail sector steadily increased and produced most jobs shared position with healthcare in 2020.

The number of jobs in healthcare was less than 5 million that increased significantly and reached more than 15 million in 2020; in contrast, healthcare department had second highest jobs more than 5 million in 1960 but numbers were plummeted and only less than five million jobs remained. Retail had almost more than 5 millions jobs in 1960, that number stood at more than 15 million in 2020 and manufacturing that had same number in 1960, showed progress, touched 20 million number in 1980 but after this graph shows sharp dip and numbers fell below 15 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The student covers all four sectors across the specified time frame, identifying key trends and making valid comparisons. However, there are some contradictory statements and factual inaccuracies in the body paragraphs. For example, in paragraph two, the student states that the 'Agriculture and retail sectors had same number of jobs in 1960' (which is correct at 6 million), but later describes retail in 1960 inconsistently as 'almost more than 5 millions jobs'. Additionally, in paragraph three, there is a confusing mix-up where healthcare is mistakenly mentioned again instead of agriculture ('in contrast, healthcare department had second highest jobs more than 5 million in 1960'). These errors prevent the response from achieving a higher band. An overview is present, but the details lack complete clarity and precision.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is divided into an introduction and two body paragraphs, providing a logical overall structure. Cohesive devices such as 'whereas', 'in contrast', and 'after this' are used to connect ideas, though some referencing and transitions become slightly confused in the final paragraph due to contradictory phrasing. Paragraphing is adequate, separating the introduction from the body content. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by repetitive information and confusing cross-references between the sectors in the third paragraph. Overall, the arrangement is coherent enough to follow, but cohesion is occasionally faulty and mechanical.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common economic and descriptive terms such as 'subsequently', 'significantly', and 'plummeted'. However, there are several word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'departments' instead of 'sectors', 'produced least jobs' rather than 'accounted for the fewest jobs', and awkward phrasing like 'shared position with healthcare'. There are also minor repetition issues and slip-ups in data interpretation that affect precision. The vocabulary used is sufficient to convey the main message, but errors in word choice restrict the score to a 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and contrasting conjunctions (e.g., 'Manufacturing had most jobs in 1960, that gradually rose till 1980...'). However, grammatical control is inconsistent. There are missing articles ('Manufacturing had most jobs'), incorrect relative pronouns ('that gradually rose'), and run-on structures or awkward comma splices ('Retail had almost more than 5 millions jobs in 1960, that number stood at...'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent the response from reaching Band 7. Punctuation is generally acceptable, but sentence boundaries are occasionally blurred.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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