Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given line chart illustrates how jobs opportunities were available in four sectors of the economy in the US over a period of 60 years from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, highest employment opportunities were identified in manufacturing sector. People interest in retail and healthcare jobs increased significantly over a period of time. However, lowest employment rate observed in agriculture stream.
In 1960, 15 million jobs available in manufacturing facilities which were rose dramatically by 20 million in 1980. From 1980 to 2020 people showed least interest in these sector. whereas, 7 million jobs were drop till 2020. Few people took jobs in retail and healthcare industries initially which were 2 million and 6 million respectively. However, employment went up rapidly and reaching to 16 million till 2020.
Moreover, similar people interest in agriculture jobs as retail industries which were around 6 million in 1960. There was a drop in agriculture jobs about 4 millions from 1960 to 1980. From 1980 to 2020 jobs remained stable around 4 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The student covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four sectors. An overview is successfully attempted, noting that manufacturing had high employment and that retail and healthcare grew significantly. However, there are some inaccuracies in reporting the data compared to the visual reference. For instance, the text states that manufacturing jobs rose to 20 million in 1980 and then dropped to 7 million by 2020 (whereas the chart shows it fell to about 13 million). Additionally, agriculture is described as having 6 million jobs in 1960 (actually around 6) but the text gets slightly confused with retail values. Nevertheless, the key trends are captured, placing this response at Band 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is arranged into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview, and then body paragraphs detailing the specific data. However, overall progression is sometimes hindered by awkward transitions and mechanical cohesive devices, such as 'whereas, 7 million jobs were drop till 2020' and 'Moreover, similar people interest in agriculture jobs'. Referencing and logical links between sentences can be clunky, and punctuation within sentences occasionally disrupts the flow. Paragraphing is present and helps structure the essay, but the management of cohesion keeps this criterion at a Band 5.5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with attempts at less common items such as 'dramatically', 'facilities', and 'industries'. However, there are notable lexical errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, including 'how jobs opportunities were available', 'highest employment opportunities were identified', 'People interest in... increased', and 'similar people interest'. Word forms are also inaccurate in places, such as 'were rose' instead of 'rose' or 'increased'. These lexical slips and restricted precision place the lexical resource firmly at Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing auxiliary verbs and incorrect prepositions or passive/active forms, as seen in '15 million jobs available in manufacturing facilities which were rose dramatically' and 'employment went up rapidly and reaching to 16 million'. Tense usage also fluctuates inappropriately between past and present descriptions. While the meaning remains generally understandable despite these errors, the high frequency of inaccurate complex structures limits the score to Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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