Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-20
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This graph illustrates, the information about the number of jobs in four sectors including manufacturing, reatil, agriculture and healthcare of the economy in the US between1960 and 2020.
The number of jobs in manufacturing sector is high among all at intial years, slowly it rises upward after 1980, sharp decline can be seen at the end of 2020. By the time, in healthcare, intially lowest, gradually it increases and after 1980, a clear dramatic increase occurs, in end of 2020 it reaches to maximum number of jobs, crossing the lines.
Additionally, in retail and agriculture number of jobs remains contast until 2000 but after this there is little fluctuations in graph by the end of last year in retail, a sharp decrease occurs contarary to that is sudden increase, in 2020 both peak meet at same point and ended upto 16 percent.
Overall, manufacturing sector is leading among all by showing highest percentage of jobs as compared to other three sectors.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address the prompt by describing the overall trends in the four sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are significant inaccuracies in reporting the data. For instance, the student states that the manufacturing sector rose upward after 1980 and that retail and agriculture 'remain contrast until 2000' with retail experiencing a 'sharp decrease' towards the end, which contradicts the actual visual data showing retail rising to 16 million. Furthermore, the overview is weak, claiming that manufacturing is leading at the end of the period when healthcare and retail actually tie at 16 million, while manufacturing dropped to 13 million. Consequently, the response only partially satisfies the task requirements due to misinterpretation of key data points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is arranged into four paragraphs, including an introduction and a conclusion. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by confusing phrasing and poor referencing, such as 'By the time, in healthcare, intially lowest...' and 'contyary to that is sudden increase'. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, and the paragraphing fails to group related trends effectively. The overall arrangement lacks clear progression, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparisons between the different economic sectors over time.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with several spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'reatil' instead of retail, 'intial' instead of initial, 'contast' instead of constant, and 'contarary' instead of contrary. The student attempts to use some less common vocabulary items like 'fluctuations' and 'dramatic increase', but misuse of terms and incorrect phrasing (e.g., 'both peak meet at same point and ended upto 16 percent') limit the precision of the response and occasionally impede communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The student demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences or poorly linked clauses that result in run-on structures, such as 'By the time, in healthcare, intially lowest, gradually it increases and after 1980, a clear dramatic increase occurs, in end of 2020 it reaches to maximum number of jobs, crossing the lines.' Grammatical errors are frequent, including missing articles ('in end of 2020'), subject-verb agreement issues ('number of jobs... remains contast'), and faulty punctuation. These errors cause frequent difficulty for the reader.
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