Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph demostrates the level of employment across different US economic sector___Manufacturing,Healthcare,Retail and agricuture___-between 1960 and 2020.

From the provided line graph it can be seen that manufacturing was a dominant sector in 1960____ 15 millions of job vacancie and than flactulate steadily to 20 millions in 1980. Afetr this it started to decrease with only 13 million of employment ratio 2020.On the contrary, healthcare and retail started with only 2 million and 6 million and rise up smoothly to 16 millions in 2020.On the other hand,agricultural industry use to only 6 million job opportunties after 1980 it stayed still____2 millions till 2020.

Overall the graph shows the great economic shift:manufacturing sector was dominant in 1960 and increase to 20 million in 1980 and than goes down till 2020.While retail and healtcare rise steadily and was dominant in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and tracks key trends across the period from 1960 to 2020. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in data reporting, such as stating manufacturing reached 20 millions in 1980 (which is approximately correct) and stating that healthcare and retail started with 2 and 6 million respectively and rose up smoothly to 16 millions. An overview is present at the end of the text. Crucially, the response falls short of the 150-word minimum requirement, containing only 140 words, which prevents it from achieving a higher score in this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized with an introduction, body, and a concluding overview. However, the paragraphing and formatting are affected by irregular spacing and punctuation errors, such as missing spaces and strange symbols like underscores used between sectors in the introduction. While cohesive devices such as 'On the contrary' and 'On the other hand' are used, the logical progression between sentences is sometimes disjointed, and referencing can be repetitive. Overall arrangement shows a basic structure, but cohesion is mechanical and faulty in places.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, attempting words related to economic shifts and employment sectors ('dominant sector', 'employment ratio', 'job opportunities'). However, there are multiple word-form and spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'demostrates' for demonstrates, 'agricuture' for agriculture, 'flactulate' for fluctuate, and 'healtcare' for healthcare. Less common vocabulary items are attempted but often marred by inaccurate collocations or word choices, which places this firmly in the band 5 range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. There are frequent errors in verb tenses and agreement, such as 'agricultural industry use to only 6 million' and 'manufacturing sector... increase to 20 million... and than goes down'. Punctuation is particularly poor, with missing spaces after periods and commas, and erratic spacing around hyphens. These errors occur frequently and can cause some difficulty for the reader, though the overall meaning remains largely comprehensible.

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