Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The given line chart shares information about the millions of job opportunities in four domains of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, The Manufacturing employment numbers peaked in 1980, after which decline steadily. The number of employment in Retail sectors increased substantially same pattern was observed in Healthcare domain. The Agriculture and Healthcare sectors had surpassed at one point between 1960 and 1980. There was a sudden decline in number of employment from 1960 to 1980 in Agriculture sector, after which a steady employment was recorded till 2000 and again fell slightly till 2020.
The number of employment in Manufacturing rose sharply till 1980 by 20 million, after that jobs decreased significantly by 7 million between 1980 and 2020. Employment in Retail and Healthcare increased dramatically from 6 million and 2 million to 16 million.
Moreover, the number of jobs available in Agriculture was 6 million, which dropped to 3 million in 1980. The period between 1980 to 2000 remained stable at 3 million, after which a small drop of 1 million was observed by 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features, trends, and comparisons across the four economic sectors. The overview correctly highlights key trends such as the peak and decline in manufacturing and the substantial growth in retail and healthcare. Data is generally reported accurately, with correct figures cited for the start and end years (e.g., Manufacturing starting at 15 million, rising to 20 million in 1980, and falling to 13 million in 2020). However, there is a minor imprecision in the overview statement regarding agriculture and healthcare having 'surpassed at one point', which is slightly confusingly phrased. Overall, the content selection is appropriate and covers all data series well, meeting the criteria for a Band 7.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview paragraph, and then detailed body paragraphs. There is a clear logical progression from the general overview to specific sector data. Cohesive devices are used to link ideas, such as 'Overall', 'after which', and 'Moreover'. However, there are some minor mechanical errors in cohesion and referencing, such as the abrupt transition in 'after that jobs decreased' and awkward phrasing in the overview paragraph. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but overall cohesion occasionally feels slightly mechanical, placing this response firmly at Band 6.5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for an academic task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'substantially', 'significantly', and 'stable'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors that detract from precision, such as 'shares information' instead of 'illustrates', 'millions of job opportunities' instead of 'number of jobs', and 'number of employment' instead of 'level of employment' or 'number of people employed'. There are also minor spelling and phrasing slips. These errors do not impede communication but prevent the score from reaching Band 7.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and time markers (e.g., 'The period between 1980 to 2000 remained stable at 3 million, after which a small drop...'). There are several grammatical errors throughout the text, such as 'decline steadily' instead of 'declined steadily', 'The number of employment' instead of 'The number of employees' or 'Employment', and 'had surpassed at one point'. Despite these errors, meaning is generally clear and communication is not impeded, demonstrating a solid Band 6.0 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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