Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This is the line graph that is showing three different sectors this graph is giving the information about the jobs in that four sectors in the US between 1960 to 2020 there are the four main sectors that are manufacturing ,retail ,agriculture and healthcare disscussed in the line graph and these four sectors are relevant to each other and they also have comparison with each other

In this line graph there are some major changes such as which sector highly increases between the given years and which sector is decreased in the given sectors the manufacturing field has the largest increasing ratio and the agriculture field has largest decreasing ratio

In 1960 there are 15 millions job and till 1980 the jobs ratio increased to 20 millions and after 1980 jobs are decreased till 2000 and till 2020 the manufacturing field is more decreased and the second sector retail it has almost 6 millions jobs but by the passage of the time it will increased day by day and till 2020 it will increased to 16 millions which is a great increasing ratio

The third sector is agriculture and in 1960 it will have decreased slowly till 2020 and this is the sector which largest decreasing ratio and the last sector is healthcare in 1960 it has almost 2 millions jobs but slowly it will increased it will 5 million jobs in 1980 and 11 million jobs in 2000 and it increased more till 16 million jobs in 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, mentioning all four sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare) and giving some specific data points such as 15 million and 20 million for manufacturing. However, the student misinterprets several key trends; for instance, stating that manufacturing has the largest increasing ratio is factually incorrect as manufacturing generally declined from 1980 to 2020. Furthermore, the selection of data is somewhat haphazard, and the overview lacks a clear summary of the overall trends. The lack of proper paragraphing also hampers the presentation of main features. This performance aligns with Band 5 descriptors, as the task is only partially addressed with under-developed or inaccurate data reporting.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The text suffers from severe structural issues, most notably a total lack of paragraphing; the entire response is written as a single, unpunctuated block of text spanning multiple sentences without periods or capital letters. Cohesive devices are largely absent or misused, relying on repetitive conjunctions like 'and' or phrases like 'by the passage of the time'. There is no clear logical progression guiding the reader through the data. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult to follow which data points correspond to which years or sectors. This level of cohesion and organisation firmly corresponds to Band 4.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses a basic and repetitive vocabulary, relying on simple terms like 'jobs', 'sectors', 'field', and 'increased'. There are some attempts at less common phrasing, but these are often awkward or imprecise, such as 'largest increasing ratio' or 'jobs ratio increased'. Word choice errors and imprecise collocations appear frequently, though they do not completely obscure the intended meaning. Spelling is generally acceptable for common words, but the overall lexical range is limited and repetitive. This fits the Band 5 descriptor profile well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical structure of the response is extremely weak, dominated by massive run-on sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions with a complete absence of terminal punctuation and proper capitalization. There is a very limited range of structures, and complex sentences are either absent or improperly constructed. Errors in tense consistency and subject-verb agreement occur throughout the text, such as 'this is the graph that is showing' and 'in 1960 it will have decreased'. These frequent and persistent errors cause significant difficulty for the reader and reflect Band 4 criteria.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.