Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The given line chart illustrates the number of jobs in four different sectors of the United States economy, from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, number of jobs in all the sectors widely fluctuated across the timeline, including a declining trend in manufacturing and agriculture, whereas surge in retail and healthcare.

In terms of growth, figure of manufacturing stood at 15 million jobs in 1960 and surged to 20 million jobs in 1980, being the largest job market among all the sectors until 2000. The number of jobs in retail and healthcare sectors gradually increased from roughly 6 and 2 million to 15 and 11 million between 1960 and 2000, respectively, before recording a relatively stagnant trend until 2020. The healthcare and retail figures finally collided, peaking at just above 15 million jobs.

When looking at manufacturing and agriculture, expereinecing completely opposite trends during initial decades([redacted phone]), decreasing emplyment in agriculture, while increasing in manufacturing. Analyzing further, followed by a steady decline between [redacted phone], manufacturing bottomed out at approximately 13 million jobs, whereas agriculture remained stagnant during same time period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The student successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by reporting the main features, trends, and comparisons across the four economic sectors. The overview accurately captures the general trajectories, noting the declines in manufacturing and agriculture alongside the growth in retail and healthcare. Key data points are cited correctly, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million in 1960, peaking at 20 million in 1980, and retail and healthcare increasing to 15 and 16 million by the end of the period. However, there are minor inaccuracies in data interpretation in the final paragraph, where the text states that retail and healthcare figures 'collided, peaking at just above 15 million' when healthcare actually reaches 16 million. Despite this minor misinterpretation, the response provides a well-developed overview of the visual data.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is logically organised and easy to follow. Progression is clear, moving from an introductory overview to body paragraphs that detail specific sector growths and declines. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different conceptual areas, such as the initial overview, the growth sectors, and the contrasting manufacturing and agriculture trends. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well, such as 'In terms of growth' and 'whereas', though some transitional phrasing feels slightly forced or mechanically executed, such as 'Analyzing further, followed by a steady decline'. Referencing is generally clear, but occasional clunky transitions prevent the essay from achieving a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The student demonstrates an adequate to good range of vocabulary suitable for an academic task 1 response, employing terms like 'fluctuated', 'declining trend', 'stagnant', 'bottomed out', and 'surged'. Less common lexical items are attempted with varying success. There are a few noticeable word choice and collocation issues, such as missing articles ('Overall, number of jobs'), typos like 'expereinecing' and 'emplyment', and slightly awkward phrasing such as 'figures finally collided'. Nevertheless, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main trends clearly and allows for some precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including participial phrases and comparative clauses. There is a reasonable command of grammar, but control is inconsistent. The text contains several grammatical errors and awkward fragments, notably missing articles ('Overall, number of jobs'), spelling errors ('expereinecing', 'emplyment'), and a fragmented sentence structure in the final paragraph: 'When looking at manufacturing and agriculture, expereinecing completely opposite trends during initial decades(1960-1980), decreasing emplyment in agriculture, while increasing in manufacturing.' These errors occasionally require the reader to re-read, placing the response firmly at band 6.0.

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