Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US over the period from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, employment in healthcare and retail experienced an upward trend, while agriculture decreased over the period. Manufacturing has the highest number of jobs in the beginning, but its job figures decreased after 1980.
In 1960, healthcare had least number of jobs, at approximately 2-3 million. The jobs rose to 5 million by the year 1980 and continued to increase until [redacted phone].In the same way, the retail sector showed continous upward trend throught the period.
In contrast, Manufacturing has the highest number of jobs in the beginning. However, it started decreasing after 1980, falling by approximately 6 million jobs by the end of 2020.Agriculture also showed downward trend and ended the period with the lowest number of jobs among the four sectors.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The student successfully highlights the main overall trends, correctly noting the upward trajectories for healthcare and retail, the downward trend for agriculture, and the peak followed by a decline in manufacturing. Key data points are generally accurate, such as manufacturing starting highest and falling by the end of the period, and retail reaching 16 million in 2020. However, there is a minor error in describing manufacturing as having the highest number of jobs 'in the beginning' without qualifying that it was matched or closely followed by others, and some data points are slightly vague. Furthermore, the length requirement is NOT met, as the response falls short of the 150-word minimum at 144 words. This under-length limitation restricts the development of ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is arranged logically into four paragraphs: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs detailing specific sectors. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', and 'In contrast', which help guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate general trends from specific data comparisons. However, referencing is occasionally repetitive, and some sentences feature abrupt transitions or typographic glitches, such as '2020.2020.In the same way', which slightly disrupts the flow and cohesion of the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for an academic task, using appropriate terms such as 'upward trend', 'downward trend', 'economy', and 'sector'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with some success, such as 'continous upward trend'. However, there are notable lexical errors and awkward phrasings, including 'had least number of jobs' (missing the superlative article 'the'), typos like 'continous', and repetitive use of basic phrases like 'number of jobs'. These lexical limitations prevent the response from achieving a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The text displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as subordinate clauses ('while agriculture decreased over the period' and 'although its job figures decreased'). There are examples of good grammatical control, but also noticeable errors in tense consistency and articles. For instance, the student shifts between past and present tenses erratically ('Manufacturing has the highest number of jobs in the beginning, but its job figures decreased') and omits necessary articles ('had least number of jobs'). Punctuation and spacing errors also appear near the end of the third paragraph. These errors occasionally distract the reader.
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