Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The illustration show that the economy different department of the jobs number in US from 1960 to 2020. Overall, the ratio of both Retail and Agriculture department was starting at the numbers of jobs but the Retail Sector was grow after that and the Agriculture sector was fall after this period.
It is quite evident from the line graph that in US the the job of economy divided into four department. In Manufacturing sector 15 millions jobs were giving in this sector during the period of 1960 and this ratio was increased in 1980 after this period the ratio was continually fall and reached almost 12 millions in 2020. However, in the Agriculture department the ratio was starting from almost 6 millions in 1960 and reached 3 millions in 2020.
Furthermore, this also give about the Healthcare and Retail department. The jobs was starting from almost 6 millions in 1960 and this ratio was continually grow between 1980 to 2020. The ratio of Retail department was also significantly increased during all period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the task by reporting information from the line graph regarding jobs in four US economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, the overview is extremely weak and confusing, merely stating that retail and agriculture started at certain numbers before changing. The body paragraphs contain numerous inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, the student claims manufacturing jobs reached almost 12 million in 2020 when the graph shows 13 million, and mixes up data points for healthcare and retail. While some main features are mentioned, the lack of a clear, accurate overview and recurring data misinterpretations restrict the score to Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into an introduction and two body paragraphs, but the organization and progression of ideas are frequently hindered by poor cohesion. Transitional markers such as 'Furthermore' and 'However' are misused or awkwardly placed. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of information is illogical—for instance, grouping retail and healthcare together in the final paragraph without clear separation leads to confusion. Referencing is also weak, with ambiguous pronouns like 'this ratio' making it difficult to follow which sector is being discussed. Overall arrangement remains disjointed, corresponding to a Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is very limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms like 'jobs', 'sector', 'department', 'ratio', and 'numbers'. The student frequently misuses lexical items, such as using 'department' instead of 'sector' and 'ratio' instead of 'number' or 'amount' ('the ratio of both Retail and Agriculture department'). Word forms and collocations are often unnatural, as seen in phrases like 'continually fall' instead of 'fell continuously' or 'grow' instead of 'grew'. Because the lexical range is narrow and errors in word choice are prominent, a Band 5.0 is appropriate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences dominate, and attempts at complex or compound structures are consistently faulty, often resulting in run-on sentences or severe structural breakdown (e.g., 'Overall, the ratio of both Retail and Agriculture department was starting at the numbers of jobs but the Retail Sector was grow after that and the Agriculture sector was fall after this period'). Tense usage is erratic, switching inappropriately between past and present. Frequent grammatical errors cause significant strain for the reader, placing this submission firmly at Band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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