Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph gives data about the number of jobs in various sctors (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare ) of the economy in the US fro 1960 to 2020.
Overall, in the healthcare and the retail sectors jobs were increased significantly over the time, however, the manufacturing and agricultural sectors experienced a modest decline.
In 1960, the highest occupying sector was manufacturing, which occupied 15 million jobs, but after experiencing a sudden increase to 20 million it's figure decreased approximately to 13 million in 2020. In contrast, there were about 5.5 million jobs in agriculture sector, but in 1980, it slightly decreased to 3 million approximately. After that, there was no significant change and in 2020, the number of jobs were roughly 2 million.
On the other hand,in 1960, there were about 3 million of jobs in healthcare sector, these numbers slightly increased to 5 million in 1980. Later on, this sector dramatically rose in 2000 and 2020, which was approximately 11 million and 15 million respectively. Furthermore, about 5 million jobs were in retail sector which rose to 15 million in 2000. Moreover, after 2000 it slightly rise up to 16 million roughly in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The student successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by presenting an overview and reporting the main trends and data points for all four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key features, such as the dominance and subsequent decline of manufacturing, the steady rise of retail and healthcare, and the low and decreasing numbers in agriculture, are all accurately reported with figures from the graph. The overview clearly highlights the major overall trends without unnecessary detail. Minor discrepancies in starting figures (e.g. stating healthcare started at 3 million instead of approximately 2 million) do not detract from the overall clarity and accuracy of the task execution.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an effective overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs dividing the sectors. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Overall', 'In contrast', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore'. Progression is clear throughout the text, although some referencing and transitional links are slightly mechanical (e.g. 'Later on, this sector dramatically rose in 2000 and 2020'). Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the declining sectors from the growing ones.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for an academic task, incorporating terms such as 'significantly', 'modest decline', 'dramatically rose', and 'respectively'. There are a few spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'sctors' instead of sectors, 'fro' instead of from, and 'it's figure' instead of its figure. The verb choice 'rise up' is slightly informal. However, the vocabulary is generally sufficient to convey the trends accurately and does not impede communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, using relative clauses and subordinate clauses (e.g., 'which occupied 15 million jobs, but after experiencing a sudden increase...'). There are several grammatical errors and punctuation slips, including comma splices and incorrect prepositions (e.g., 'in agriculture sector' missing an article, 'there were about 3 million of jobs', and 'the number of jobs were' where 'was' is required with a singular subject phrase). Despite these errors, the sentences remain largely understandable, placing the response solidly in Band 6.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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