Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The given line graph illustrates data about the number of employment in four categories of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, jobs in retail and healthcare sectors increased significantly and stood in the first place. Employment in the agriculture sector remained low since 1960.
Employment in the manufacturing sector increased significantly from 15 million to 20 million between 1960 to 1980. This categorie had a gradual decreased between 1980 to 2020 with about 13 million jobs. Whereas employment in the agriculture sector plummet over the period with a stable number of jobs from 1980 to 2000. The figures decreased from 6 million to 3 million.
Meanwhile, jobs in the retail and healthcare sector escalated rapidly over 6 decades. Empolyment in the retail sector rose from 6 million to 16 million with a steady rise between 1980 to 2000. Furthermore, jobs in healthcare sector expanded from 3 million to 16 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The student covers all parts of the task by reporting data for all four economic sectors across the entire time period. An overview is provided, noting the general upward trends in retail and healthcare alongside the persistently low agriculture figures. Key features and comparisons are generally well selected and supported with accurate statistics from the graph, such as manufacturing rising from 15 million to 20 million between 1960 and 1980 before declining to 13 million in 2020. However, there are a few minor inaccuracies or awkward expressions in data reporting, such as stating that retail and healthcare 'stood in the first place' jointly at the end of the period, and a slight misreading of the initial healthcare figure (stating 3 million instead of approximately 2 million). Nevertheless, the main trends are clearly identified and effectively communicated, satisfying the requirements for a Band 6.5 or solid 6.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The response is logically organized with a clear overall arrangement. It features a four-paragraph structure consisting of an introduction, an overall summary, and two body paragraphs dedicated to contrasting sector trends. Cohesive devices such as 'Whereas', 'Meanwhile', and 'Furthermore' are used to connect ideas and make comparisons, although some transitions feel slightly mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct groups of data, and referencing is generally clear throughout the text, allowing the reader to follow the progression of information easily, aligning well with Band 6 descriptors.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and descriptive verbs such as 'escalated', 'plummet', and 'expanded'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'number of employment' instead of 'number of employees' or 'level of employment', 'This categorie' (spelling error), and 'gradual decreased' instead of 'gradual decrease'. Despite these inaccuracies and occasional spelling slips, the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning without severely impeding communication, placing this firmly at Band 6.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and subordinate structures like 'Whereas employment in the agriculture sector plummet over the period...'. However, grammatical control is inconsistent. There are several noticeable errors, including tense and word form inconsistencies such as 'plummet' instead of 'plummeted', incorrect article usage, and minor prepositional flaws. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while the errors occasionally cause minor friction for the reader, they do not impede overall comprehension. The variety of structures combined with frequent errors points directly to a Band 6.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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