Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph demonstrates the information about the number of placements (in millions) from 1960 to 2020 in these sector Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and healthcare respectively.

overall, it is clear that Manufacturing division has significantly increased number of jobs then the rest of sectors. In contrast, Agriculture sector has the least count of employment during the period of 1960 and 2020.

The manufacturing sector has 15 million jobs in 1960 by which it soared sharply reaches at 20 million in 1980, afterwards it declined steadily till 2020 having the employment of roughly 13 million. On the other hand, Agriculture has roughly 5 million jobs in 1960 then it dropped marginally to (~3 million) placements at 1960, afterwards remained stable till 2020.

While, Retail sector has the same number of jobs as of Agriculture in 1960, it climbed gradually till 2000 with around 15 million jobs then maintained the constant level till 2020. Additionally, Healthcare sector has lowest number of jobs in 1960, estimation of 2 million jobs, then slightly increased in 1980 of 5 million. Afterwards, soared dramatically till 2020 and have around 15 million placements, quite similar to retail division.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response attempts to cover all four sectors across the given period, but contains several factual inaccuracies when compared to the visual data. For instance, the student states that the Manufacturing division had a 'significantly increased number of jobs then the rest of sectors' overall, which is inaccurate as Manufacturing actually ended lower in 2020 than in 1960. Additionally, the text claims Agriculture had 'roughly 5 million jobs in 1960 then it dropped marginally to (~3 million) placements at 1960', which contains a contradiction in the timeline and misreads the starting point (Agriculture started at around 6 million). While an overview is attempted, the inaccuracies in data reporting prevent the response from achieving a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is divided into logical paragraphs, starting with an introduction and an overall statement, followed by body paragraphs detailing specific sectors. However, cohesion is often faulty or mechanical, relying heavily on basic transitional markers like 'afterwards', 'then', and 'while'. Furthermore, referencing and logical progression within sentences can be confusing, such as the sudden shift when discussing the Retail and Agriculture sectors together. Paragraphing is present and appropriate for a Task 1 response, but the mechanical transitions keep this criterion at a band 6.0 level.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'soared sharply', 'declined steadily', and 'dramatically', but these attempts are frequently marred by imprecise word choice and awkward collocations (e.g., 'number of placements', 'Manufacturing division has significantly increased number of jobs then the rest'). There are also recurring lexical inaccuracies, such as using 'division' or 'sector' inconsistently and awkward phrasing like 'estimation of 2 million jobs'. The vocabulary is adequate for basic task communication, but limitations and errors restrict it to a band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some capability to construct longer sentences. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and punctuation issues throughout the text. Examples include missing articles ('in healthcare', 'to retail division'), incorrect prepositions and comparative structures ('number of jobs then the rest'), and awkward verb tenses or agreements ('have around 15 million placements' referring to the past). While these errors do not completely impede overall understanding, their frequency prevents the response from reaching a higher band.

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