Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates the data about the number of total jobs in four different sectors of the economy in US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, highest number of the jobs in both sectors retail and healthcare. Meanwhile, the lowest number of the jobs in agriculture and remain the same throughout the period.

Firstly, in 1960, number of jobs in manufcaturing sectors was at 15 million, that was increased in the next two decades at the top of the job list was about 20 million in 1980. After that it steadily reduces in the following years and stopped at 13 million in 2020. Moreover, agriculture jobs was at 6 million in the yaer of 1960, and it reducs until next year. In the following years the number of jobs in agriculturefluctuated in the following years and lowest in 2020, at 2 million.

Secondly, number of jobs in healthcare sectors was lowest in the beginning of the years, but afetr that it roses from 3 million to 5 million in the next dcades until 1980. Jobs in healthcare sectors dramatically increased throughout the following years, and reached it own peak at 16 million, in 2020. In addition, 6 million jobs in retail sectors seadily increased from 1960, and it reached to 16 million , in 2020.

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AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors shown in the graph and provides general trends, making relevant comparisons across the sixty-year period. However, there are some inaccuracies in reporting the data. For instance, the student states that the highest number of jobs were in both retail and healthcare, and that agriculture remained the same throughout the period (whereas agriculture actually declined from 6 million to 2 million). The overview is also slightly confused regarding which sectors were highest initially. Despite these data misreadings, the main features of manufacturing, retail, and healthcare are generally identified. To reach a higher band, the student must ensure data points are accurately transcribed from the visual prompt and that the overview clearly highlights the overall trends without factual contradictions.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is divided into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction and a basic overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the specific economic sectors. Cohesive devices are used to signal progression, such as 'Overall', 'Firstly', 'After that', and 'Secondly'. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or imprecise, and referencing is occasionally faulty, such as confusing pronoun or temporal references ('until next year', 'beginning of the years'). Paragraphing is present and helps structure the response, but overall progression within paragraphs lacks seamless connectivity. To improve, the student should use a wider variety of cohesive phrases more naturally and ensure clear logical links between sentences.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range to communicate basic trends and figures, utilizing terms such as 'sector', 'economy', 'steadily', 'fluctuated', and 'dramatically increased'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'manufcaturing sectors', 'reducs', 'seadily', and 'reached it own peak'. Spelling errors occur frequently ('manufcaturing', 'reducs', 'yaer', 'afetr', 'roses', 'seadily'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, preventing the response from achieving a higher band score. To improve, the writer needs to expand their range of less common vocabulary, check spelling carefully, and ensure precise word choice and word formation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including relative clauses and time markers ('that was increased in the next two decades', 'while the lowest number of the jobs in agriculture'). However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and articles (e.g., 'number of highest jobs', 'agriculture jobs was', 'healthcare sectors was lowest', 'afetr that it roses'). Punctuation and sentence boundaries are also occasionally mishandled, with dangling commas and awkward phrasing. These errors frequently cause strain for the reader, although communication of the general meaning is not completely lost. To improve, the student must focus on basic grammatical control, particularly verb forms and article usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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