Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given line graph illustrates the number of workers in four sectors of the United State, namely- Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare. Furthermore, the graph is based between a period between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, Healthcare and Retail sectors has experienced a constant growth over the period. However, Manufacturing peaked in 1980 but started falling consistently till the end of the period. Whereas Agriculture did not seem to have grown in the last sixty-year period.
On the one hand, there are two sectors Retail and Healthcare that have experienced a constant growth in employment over the sixty-year period. Although, Retail began with 6 million jobs and till 2000 it saw a continuous growth, after that it declined and ended with 16 million jobs. Moreover, Healthcare began with 2 million jobs and ended up with 16 million jobs which is equal to Retail.
On the other hand, Manufacturing was at its highest in 1960 with 15 million jobs and experienced a stable growth till 1980 but after that it seems to fall and in the end it was left with 13 million jobs. Besides that Agriculture started with 6 million jobs and experienced constant decline till the end of the period .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The student covers all parts of the task well, selecting and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is successfully provided in the second paragraph, capturing the overall trends such as the growth in Healthcare and Retail and the decline in Agriculture. Key data points are correctly cited, such as Manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 (though the student misstated it starting at 15 million in 1960 and growing to 1980, when it actually started at 15 in 1960 and peaked at 20 in 1980, which is mostly accurate). Comparisons are made appropriately, such as noting that Healthcare ended with 16 million jobs, equal to Retail. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in data interpretation, such as stating that Retail declined after 2000 (the graph shows Retail actually continued rising slightly to 16 million in 2020). Despite these minor misreadings, the response effectively outlines the major trends and fulfills all requirements of Task 1.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response is logically organized with a clear overall progression. It begins with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs grouping the sectors logically into growing sectors and declining sectors. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'Overall', 'However', 'On the one hand', and 'On the other hand'. However, some cohesive devices are used slightly inappropriately or mechanically, such as 'Furthermore, the graph is based between a period' and 'Although, Retail began with 6 million jobs and till 2000 it saw a continuous growth, after that it declined' (which misinterprets the trend and uses punctuation incorrectly). Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately to separate distinct ideas, ensuring the writing is coherent overall.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common economic and descriptive terms such as 'constant growth', 'consistently', 'employment', and 'decline'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'the graph is based between a period between' (awkward phrasing) and stating that Manufacturing 'experienced a stable growth till 1980' when the data shows a sharp increase. Spelling is generally accurate, but vocabulary control lacks the precision and flexibility expected at higher bands. Communication is not impeded, but word choices remain somewhat repetitive.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and subordinating conjunctions ('that have experienced', 'Although, Retail began...'). However, there are several grammatical errors and punctuation issues throughout the text. For example, subject-verb agreement is flawed in 'Healthcare and Retail sectors has experienced' (should be 'have experienced'), and punctuation is misused with introductory dependent clauses, such as 'Although, Retail began with 6 million jobs and till 2000 it saw a continuous growth, after that it declined' (comma splice and fragment misuse). While complex structures are attempted, errors persist and occasionally require the reader to re-read.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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