Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The chart illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors—manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare—in the US between 1960 and 2020.
It is observed that manufacturing recorded the highest number of jobs but later had a slight decline across the years. In contrast, healthcare and retail showed the lowest jobs available in the early years then it had a steady rise till it surpassed manufacturing in the later years.
Overall, Agriculture recorded the low amount of jobs between 1960 and 2020.
In 1960, 15,000,000 jobs were made available for individual in US, then it later grew to 20,000,000 jobs in 1980. Unfortunately down the years, the number of employment decreases to roughly 13,000,000 in 2020. Comparing to agriculture who had a decline across the year, it started off at about 6,000,000 jobs in 1960 followed by a steady decline to about 3,000,000 till 2020.
Utimately, retail and agriculture had similar trends, it kicked off with about 2.5 million and 6 million jobs respectively, and experienced a gradual growth of about 16 million jobs in year 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response covers all parts of the task by reporting on the four sectors across the given time period. An overview is attempted, and key features such as manufacturing peaking and healthcare growing are mentioned. However, there are some data inaccuracies and confusion in the text. For example, the student writes that retail 'kicked off with about 2.5 million' when the chart shows 6 million in 1960. Additionally, the final paragraph groups retail and agriculture together confusingly ('retail and agriculture had similar trends'), whereas they followed vastly opposite trajectories. Furthermore, the unit scale is occasionally confused (writing 15,000,000 in one sentence and then using millions inconsistently or misinterpreting baseline figures). Despite these data handling flaws, the main trends are generally identified, placing the response at Band 5.5 to 6.0. Band 6 is awarded as the main features are addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay is divided into logical paragraphs, including an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the internal cohesion and paragraph structure suffer from confusing grouping and abrupt transitions. For instance, the overview paragraph is split awkwardly, and the final paragraph attempts to combine retail and agriculture despite their contrasting trends ('retail and agriculture had similar trends, it kicked off with about 2.5 million and 6 million jobs respectively'). Cohesive devices are somewhat mechanical or misused ('Unfortunately down the years', 'Utimately'). Paragraphing is present, but overall logical progression is hindered by factual confusion and disjointed summary statements, supporting a Band 5.5 score.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, incorporating terms such as 'sector', 'decline', 'steady rise', and 'surpassed'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'lowest jobs available', 'made available for individual in US', and misspelling 'Utimately' instead of 'Ultimately'. Collocations are occasionally unnatural, such as 'recorded the low amount of jobs'. While the vocabulary allows the main message to be conveyed, errors in word choice and spelling prevent the response from achieving a higher band, placing it firmly at Band 5.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'The chart illustrates...' and 'In contrast, healthcare and retail showed...'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and lapses in agreement, such as 'then it had a steady rise' (referring to plural subjects 'healthcare and retail'), 'the number of employment decreases' (tense shift and singular/plural mismatch), and 'Comparing to agriculture who had a decline' (dangling modifier and incorrect preposition 'Comparing to'). Punctuation and article usage also show recurrent errors (e.g., 'for individual in US', 'across the year'). These errors cause occasional strain for the reader, fitting the Band 5.5 descriptor.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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