Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line chart illustrates the number of jobs in millions in the economy in four sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it is clear that Retail had the highest level throughout the period. The most noticeable growth was in the healthcare sector it rose at the end of the period, while Agriculture remained lowest level throughout the period.
In 1960, the manufacturing sector had 15 million jobs and increased in numbers in 1980 by 20 million, but in 2020, it dipped in numbers nearly around 11 million of jobs. In comparison at Retail and Healthcare, healthcare seems to be the second-lowest level, but by the end of period it increased rapidly by 15 million jobs, whereas in the field of Retail it was started by 5 millions of jobs, but at the end the figure was 15 million of jobs in the economy.
Turning to agriculture in 1980, it dipped down in numbers by 1 million whereas at the end it remains the lowest in figure by approximately 1.5 million jobs in the economy
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student attempts to cover all four sectors across the given period, providing an overview and specific data points. However, there are notable errors and inaccuracies in data interpretation. For example, the student states that Retail had the highest level throughout the period, which contradicts the graph where Manufacturing started highest at 15 million in 1960 and peaked at 20 million in 1980 before declining. Furthermore, the phrasing regarding numerical values is often confused, such as stating manufacturing 'increased in numbers in 1980 by 20 million' (when it reached 20 million) and misreading endpoints for healthcare and retail. While the main features are partially addressed, the inaccuracies in reporting data figures pull the score down to a Band 5.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response is structured into four paragraphs, including an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs dealing with specific sectors. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall', 'In comparison', and 'Turning to agriculture', which help to signpost the progression of ideas. However, paragraphing is somewhat disjointed, and referencing is occasionally unclear (e.g., 'In comparison at Retail and Healthcare...'). The overall arrangement provides a logical flow from general trends to specific details, but the mechanical and sometimes inaccurate use of cohesive ties keeps this criterion at a Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common sector-related terms like 'manufacturing', 'agriculture', 'healthcare', and 'retail'. However, there are frequent inappropriate word choices and awkward collocations, such as 'highest level throughout the period', 'dipped in numbers nearly around 11 million of jobs', and 'remains the lowest in figure'. Repetition of phrases like 'in the economy' also limits lexical variety. These errors in word choice and phrasing demonstrate control typical of a Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response includes a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety in structure. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward clause structures throughout the text. Examples include 'the healthcare sector it rose at the end', 'manufacturing sector had 15 million jobs and increased in numbers in 1980 by 20 million', and prepositional inaccuracies like 'at Retail and Healthcare'. Punctuation is basic, and run-on structures occasionally impede smooth reading. Because of the frequency of grammatical inaccuracies, this performance corresponds to a Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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