Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The given line graph illustrates the number of jobs in foue differnt sectors of the economy in United states among 1960 and 2020. Interestingly, healthcare sector economy was steadily increase over the period.

It is clear from the line graph that In 1960, aroun 5 millions jobs in two sectors which were retail and agriculture departments. Economy of retail sector was increase over the period. However, jobs in healcare sector economy declined in 1980 in US and this figure steable till 2020.

Furthermore, manufacturing department economy was higher than healthcare economy in US. 15 millions vacancy were available in year manufacturing department in year 1960 which incresed after 20 years. Afterthat, this trend was upwars from year 2020. Number of jobs in agriculture sector was only 3 millions which was continusly increase over the year and reached at 16 million in US.

Overall, manufacture department had the highest number of job opportunity of the economy in US. However, healthcare department had least.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to cover the main features of the line graph showing job trends in four US economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, the student states that jobs in the healthcare sector declined in 1980 and remained stable until 2020, whereas the graph clearly shows a steady and dramatic rise from 2 million to 16 million. Furthermore, the overview is incorrect regarding the highest sector, claiming manufacturing had the most jobs overall when retail and healthcare reached 16 million by 2020 and manufacturing declined from 20 million. Because of these serious misinterpretations and inaccurate reporting of key data points, the response falls into Band 4.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The essay is divided into distinct paragraphs, attempting a standard structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and an overview. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by confusing sentences, poor referencing, and abrupt shifts in topic. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, such as 'Interestingly,' 'However,' and 'Afterthat.' Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs is weak, meaning information and ideas are not arranged in a fully coherent manner. This places the response firmly at Band 4.0 for coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive ('economy', 'sector', 'jobs', 'department', 'increase'). There are also multiple spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'foue' instead of 'four', 'differnt' instead of 'different', 'healcare' instead of 'healthcare', and 'steable' instead of 'stable'. These lexical limitations and frequent spelling errors strain the reader and reflect a limited, basic vocabulary range consistent with a Band 4.0 score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences predominate, and attempts at more complex structures are almost universally faulty, containing severe errors such as tense confusion ('sector economy was steadily increase', 'Economy of retail sector was increase', 'was continusly increase'). Punctuation and article usage are also problematic throughout. Errors are frequent and often distort the intended meaning, matching the criteria for a Band 4.0 in grammatical range and accuracy.

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