Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line chart illustrates the number of level in four different sectors of the US economy from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it is clear that the manufacturing industries have highest employment figures initially. In contrast retail and agriculture industries had lowest starting figures but they both end with a sharp boost in their employment throughout the period.
In 1960, manufacturing industry ranked highest among all other categories provided approximately 15 million jobs. However, this figures dropped gradually over the period in 2020. While, the agriculture industry had fewer positions which is just over 5 million in 1960 this figure is no more maintained or dropped marginally in 2020.
The retail industry began with just over 5 million job positions which climbed significantly from 1960 to 2000. However, this figure remained steady to its ending year 2020. As compared to health care industry beginning with lowest stats at approximately 0.3 million positions in 1960 which climbed sharply and touch to 15 million throughout the year 2020
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student covers all four sectors and attempts to provide an overview and key trends, meeting the basic requirements of Task 1. However, there are several inaccurate data points and misreadings of the graph. For instance, the overview incorrectly states that retail and agriculture had low starting figures 'end with a sharp boost', whereas agriculture actually dropped significantly to 2 million by 2020. Furthermore, the healthcare starting figure is misread as approximately 0.3 million instead of 2 million, and retail is stated to have remained steady in 2020 when the graph shows it rising to 16 million. Due to these factual inaccuracies regarding the visual data, the response falls into the Band 5 to 6 range for task fulfillment.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response is structured into four paragraphs, including an introduction and an overall summary statement. Logical connectors and transition words such as 'Overall', 'In contrast', 'However', and 'As compared to' are used to link ideas and guide the reader. However, referencing and cohesion are occasionally faulty or awkward, such as the abrupt transition in the final sentence ('As compared to health care industry beginning...'). Paragraphing is present, but the overall progression of ideas feels somewhat disjointed due to the mixing of data points within the body paragraphs. Cohesion overall is adequate for a Band 6.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range to discuss economic sectors and employment trends, using words like 'industries', 'employment figures', 'positions', and 'significantly'. However, there are notable lexical errors and unnatural collocations, such as 'number of level' instead of 'number of jobs', 'this figures' (agreement error), and 'touch to 15 million'. Less common vocabulary is attempted but frequently inaccurate or awkward in style. Spelling is generally accurate, but word choices occasionally lack precision, placing this response securely at Band 5.5 to 6.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, using subordinate clauses introduced by 'While' and 'As compared to'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with multiple errors including subject-verb agreement issues ('this figures dropped', 'industries had lowest starting figures... they both end'), missing articles ('in manufacturing industry', 'to health care industry'), and sentence fragments or run-on structures. These errors require some effort to decode in places but do not completely impede overall communication, reflecting the Band 5 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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