Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line chart illustrates the number of employment in four different sectors of the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is clear that the manufacturing industries have highest employment figures initially. In contrast retail and agriculture industries had lowest starting figures but they both end with a sharp boost in their employment throughout the period.

In 1960, manufacturing industry ranked highest among all other categories provided approximately 15 million jobs. However, this figures dropped gradually over the period in 2020. While, the agriculture industry had fewer positions which is just over 5 million in 1960 this figure is no more maintained or dropped marginally in 2020.

The retail industry began with just over 5 million job positions which climbed significantly from 1960 to 2000. However, this figure remained steady to its ending year 2020. As compared to health care industry beginning with lowest stats roundabout 0.3 million positions in 1960 which climbed sharply and touch to 15 million throughout the year 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features and trends across all four sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overall trend is provided, and key data points such as the initial 15 million for manufacturing and the rise of healthcare and retail are highlighted. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in data reporting; for example, the student states that retail 'remained steady to its ending year 2020', whereas the graph shows an increase from 15 million in 2000 to 16 million in 2020. Additionally, agriculture is described as dropping marginally, but it actually remained steady at 3 million from 1980 to 2000 before dropping to 2 million in 2020. Despite these minor discrepancies, the overall trends are adequately captured.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is logically organised into an introduction, an overall summary paragraph, and body paragraphs detailing specific sectors. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. Cohesive devices are generally used to guide the reader, such as 'Overall', 'In contrast', and 'However'. However, referencing and transitions are sometimes mechanical or slightly imprecise, as seen in the transition 'While, the agriculture industry had fewer positions...'. Overall progression is clear, achieving a coherent structure throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'employment figures', 'gradually', and 'climbed significantly'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'number of employment' instead of 'number of people employed' or 'level of employment', and 'touch to 15 million' instead of 'reaching 15 million'. Spelling is generally accurate, but some phrasing sounds unnatural, placing the response firmly in the band 6 category.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating clauses with 'while', 'as compared to', and 'which'. There are several grammatical errors and punctuation slips present, such as missing articles ('manufacturing industry' instead of 'the manufacturing industry'), pluralisation issues ('this figures'), and awkward prepositional use ('steady to its ending year'). These errors do not impede overall communication, but they occur with enough frequency to prevent the score from reaching band 7.

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