Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Given graph illustrates the employment data in the US focusing on four major sectors of the economy between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the data highlights the sectors spaning from manfuacturing, retail, agricutural and healthcare and its progrss throughout the year 1960 to 2020. Interestingly, the lowest employment rate spans from 3 million to 15 million standing at the top of the chart.

In an year 1960, Healthcare sector marekd as the least employable sector in the US with only 3 million whereas Manufacturing was on top of the demand with 15 millions jobs. Where as, for Agricuture and Retail sectors the number remaind quite the same with 6 milion jobs in each sector. Throughtout the Years 1980 to 2000, the US job market saw a remarkable surge in employment with Healthcare rising upto 11 million jobs and Reatil surged to 15 million opportunities. However, manufacturing tops the list with most demanded sector with 20 million job oppurtunites in 1980 but witnessed a sharp decline to 16 million jobs by the year 2000. Agriculture turned out as the least employable sector with sharp descend of 3 million across both the years

Towards an year 2020, the US job sector saw a sharp decline in manufacturing with 13 million jobs. Moreover Healthcare and Retail both share the same number topping the list with 16 million opportunites in both the sectors. Agriculture continued to remain least employable with further decline of 2 million jobs by the year 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student covers all parts of the task by reporting data for all four sectors across the given years. A clear overview is attempted, and key trends such as the rise of healthcare and retail alongside the decline of manufacturing and agriculture are identified. However, there are some minor factual inaccuracies when reading the graph, such as stating that healthcare started at 3 million in 1960 (it was closer to 2 million) and minor confusions in specific data points. Despite these minor misreadings, the main features and comparisons are successfully highlighted, satisfying the requirements for a Band 6.5 descriptor.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is organized into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview, body paragraphs tracking the timeline, and a concluding snapshot for 2020. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Interestingly', 'In an year 1960', and 'However'. Although paragraphing is used appropriately and overall progression is clear, referencing and cohesive links are sometimes mechanical or awkward (e.g., 'Where as, for Agricuture and Retail sectors the number remaind quite the same'). This places the response comfortably at Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student attempts a range of vocabulary relevant to the task, including terms like 'employment data', 'surge', 'sharp decline', and 'opportunity'. However, there are numerous spelling errors throughout the text, including 'manfuacturing', 'agricutural', 'progrss', 'marekd', 'reminad', and 'Reatil'. Furthermore, some word choices and collocations are unnatural or imprecise (e.g., 'least employable sector'). While the vocabulary is adequate to convey the general message, these persistent spelling and lexical errors limit the score to a Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, utilizing subordinate clauses and comparative structures. However, grammatical control is inconsistent. There are several recurring errors with articles, prepositions, and tense consistency, such as 'In an year 1960', 'sector marekd as', 'the number remaind', and 'Towards an year 2020'. Punctuation errors, such as missing commas after introductory phrases and incomplete sentence boundaries, also appear. These errors occasionally distract the reader, aligning the grammar with the Band 5.5 descriptors.

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