Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line chart illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020, with figures in million.
Overall, economy in retail and healthcare increased significantly over the period, whereas agriculture experienced a continuous decline. Mnanufacturing was the largest source of employment at the begining and reached a peak in 1980, but its figure then fell. By 2020, healthcare had become the largest employer, while agriculture had the fewest jobs.
In 1960, manufacturing provided approximately 15 million jobs,compared with around 6 million in both retail and agriculture. Healthcare wae the smallest sector, with almost 2 million jobs, then it gradually rose and reached almost 16 million in 2020. Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of roughly 20 million in 1980, Before decling gradually to around 13 million in 2020.
Agriculture employment fell significently from 6 million in 1960 to only 3 million in 1980. It reamined stable in 2000 but decline slightly to about 2 million in 2020. In contrast, retail also increased with the pasege of time reached at 15 million in 2000 and after that it inreased steadily 16 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response covers all key features of the graph well. You successfully identify the major trends, such as the significant growth in retail and healthcare, the continuous decline in agriculture, and the peak and subsequent fall in manufacturing. An appropriate overview is provided at the end of the first paragraph, outlining the main overall patterns. Data points are accurately referenced from the chart, including figures for 1960, 1980, 2000, and 2020. The comparisons between sectors are well made, such as noting that healthcare became the largest employer by 2020 while agriculture had the fewest. The task is fully and effectively addressed, meeting all requirements for an upper-intermediate level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The information and ideas are logically organized with a clear overall progression. The response is divided into logical paragraphs, starting with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the specific data points and trends. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well to connect ideas, such as 'Overall', 'In contrast', and 'then it gradually rose'. However, there are some minor mechanical links and occasional awkward phrasing in transitions between sentences. Referencing is generally clear, and paragraphing is used appropriately to group related data sets together.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary appropriate for an academic task, including terms like 'significantly', 'continuous decline', 'employment', and 'gradually rose'. Less common lexical items are attempted with some awareness of style, such as 'source of employment' and 'smallest sector'. However, there are several spelling and typographical errors throughout the text, including 'Mnanufacturing', 'begining', 'wae', 'decling', 'significently', 'reamined', 'pasege', and 'inreased'. These lexical errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the score from reaching a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
A mix of simple and complex sentence structures is used successfully, such as 'while agriculture had the fewest jobs' and 'Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak... before declining gradually...'. There is good control over past tense forms for historical data. However, there are some grammatical and punctuation errors present, such as missing articles ('economy in retail'), tense inconsistencies, and run-on structures like 'reached at 15 million in 2000 and after that it inreased steadily 16 million'. Despite these errors, communication is rarely impeded, and the majority of sentences demonstrate good grammatical control.
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