Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph given illustrates the number of employment numbers across four distinct sectors of US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the data reveals contradiction of trends. The workforce in the Retail and the Healthcare saw a significant growth over the 60 years of period, whereas employment in manufacturing and Agrilcultre saw an overall decline.

The Retail industry started with 5 mllion jobs in 1960 and from then saw a steady increase till the 2000 and from onwards it was nearly the same of around 15million jobs to 2020.The Healthcare industry started off with few million jobs in 1960 and from then onwards it has only seen good number of employment growth over the years of timeline from 1980 to 2020.

Meanwhile, it has been opposite for the Manufacturing and Agriculture sector. The Manufacturing sector started off well with 15 million of employment rate in the 1960 and saw a significant growth till 1980 but the rate declined from then and it just went down till 2020. Secondly, talking about Agriculture it has never been good even though started with 5 million it declined from 1980 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student successfully covers all four sectors shown in the graph and makes relevant comparisons over the period from 1960 to 2020. The overview effectively highlights the contrasting trends between the growing sectors (Retail and Healthcare) and the declining sectors (Manufacturing and Agriculture). However, there are some minor inaccuracies and vague descriptions in the data reporting. For instance, the student states that the Retail industry started with '5 million jobs in 1960' when the graph shows approximately 6 million, and refers to 'few million jobs' for Healthcare instead of the starting figure of 2 million. Despite these minor data approximation discrepancies, all main features are identified and contrasted clearly, satisfying the requirements for a Band 6.0 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is structured into clear paragraphs, starting with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the specific sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'whereas', 'Meanwhile', and 'Secondly' are used to guide the reader through the data. However, paragraphing and referencing can be somewhat mechanical, and logical progression is occasionally hindered by imprecise sentence construction, such as 'from then onwards it was nearly the same of around 15million jobs to 2020'. The referencing between ideas sometimes lacks smoothness, placing this response firmly at Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting less common economic and descriptive terms such as 'employment numbers', 'workforce', 'significant growth', and 'decline'. However, there are several noticeable lexical errors, awkward word choices, and spelling mistakes. Examples include 'employment numbers across four distinct sectors of US economy' (missing article), 'contradiction of trends' (inappropriate collocation), 'Agrilcultre' (spelling error), and 'good number of employment growth' (unnatural phrasing). These errors show an attempt to use a varied lexicon, but limitations in precision restrict the score to Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and time markers like 'from 1960 to 2020' and 'whereas employment in manufacturing... saw an overall decline'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward structures throughout the text, such as 'the Retail and the Healthcare saw' (unnecessary article), 'over the 60 years of period', and run-on sentences like 'The Retail industry started with 5 mllion jobs in 1960 and from then saw a steady increase till the 2000 and from onwards...'. These errors occasionally cause slight strain for the reader, aligning the grammar with a Band 5.5 level.

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