Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The trend graph compares the number of jobs in four different sectors including manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the trend graph gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors in the US. Retail and healthcare jobs gradually increased and gained equal million of jobs. Although, Manufacturing and agriculture jobs were continously decreased.
In 1960 to 1980, manufacturing and agricultural sectors had higher number of jobs, however, these sectors gradually reduced. In agriculture sector, number of jobs decreased from 6 million to 1 million. Both in retail and manufacturing sectors, the number of jobs gradully increased up to 15 million from 1960 to 2020. But in 1980, manufacturing sector achieved 20 million jobs in US. Therefore, other sectors jobs had not gone up to 20 million. In 2020, only manufacturing and retail sectors achieved 15 million jobs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main trends in the four sectors between 1960 and 2020, providing an overview and some specific data points. However, the length requirement of 150 words is not met, falling just short at 149 words, which results in a penalty under Task Achievement. Furthermore, there are several inaccurate data reports and misreadings of the graph. For instance, the student states that agriculture decreased to 1 million (the graph shows approximately 2 or 3 million), and claims that both retail and manufacturing increased up to 15 million from 1960 to 2020, whereas manufacturing actually peaked in 1980 at 20 million and then declined to 13 million. These factual inaccuracies prevent the response from achieving a higher band score.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into an introduction, an overview paragraph, and a body paragraph, showing some attempt at a logical structure. However, paragraphing is underdeveloped, with the overview and body sections lacking clear separation and logical flow. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or repetitively (e.g., 'Although', 'Therefore'), and referencing is sometimes confusing, such as the abrupt transition in the final paragraph. Progression throughout the response is disjointed, making it difficult to follow the relationships between the data points. Overall, the organizational framework meets the criteria for Band 5.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, including topic-specific terms like 'sectors', 'economy', 'manufacturing', and 'agricultural'. However, the range is limited and repetitive, with frequent word-choice and collocation errors, such as 'trend graph' instead of 'line graph', 'gained equal million of jobs', and 'continously decreased' (spelling error). The student attempts some less common vocabulary, but inaccurate control over word forms and phrasing restricts the lexical score to Band 5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, though complex structures are often faulty or awkward (e.g., 'Retail and healthcare jobs gradually increased and gained equal million of jobs'). There are frequent grammatical errors regarding prepositions, verb tenses, and subject-verb agreement, such as 'In 1960 to 1980', 'manufacturing and agricultural sectors had higher number of jobs', and 'other sectors jobs had not gone up'. While these errors do not completely obscure meaning, they cause noticeable strain for the reader, placing the grammar score firmly at Band 5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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