Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the information in the graph is given about the number of jobs in four sector of the economy of US. In 1960 manufacturing sector has much higher ratio of jobs that its 15 million whereas, Retail and Agricultural sector have same numbers of jobs in 1960 approximately 6 million meanwhile in the same year healthcare has much lower rate approx 3 million jobs which makes it lowest at that time. however as the time passes the number of jobs in health care sector start to rise and there is a massive increase that in 2000 it reaches to approx 11 million and in 2020 it grows to 15.5 to 16million approx. Anyways agriculture secotr did not get any rise as its number of jobs decreases from 6 million to 3 million approx. if we talk about retail sector it also perform well and the number of jobs increases and in 2020 it reaches to 15.5 to 16 million approxx from 6 million. in the nutshell if we talk about manufacturing sector it got rise in 1980 as it reaches to 20 million but then it start to fall and in 2020 number of jobs reaches to 13.5 million approxx

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and reports main features with comparisons over the period from 1960 to 2020. However, the structure lacks an introductory overview paragraph, which prevents the response from achieving a higher band. Data points are generally reported accurately, such as noting manufacturing starting at 15 million and peaking in 1980 at 20 million, and retail increasing to around 16 million by 2020. There are slight misreadings or approximations in specific figures (e.g., stating healthcare started at 3 million when it was closer to 2 million), but these do not detract from the overall successful reporting of the main trends. The student clearly distinguishes between rising and falling sectors, satisfying the core requirements of Task 1.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response is written as a single, dense block of text without paragraph breaks, which significantly impacts the logical layout and visual cohesion of the report. Although there is a chronological progression and the use of transitional markers like 'meanwhile', 'however', and 'in the nutshell', the absence of paragraphing makes the text difficult to navigate. Referencing is sometimes unclear, with repetitive phrasing such as 'if we talk about' used multiple times to introduce new sections. To improve, the writer should separate the overview, the rising trends, and the falling trends into distinct, well-structured paragraphs.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'sector', 'economy', 'ratio', and 'increase'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'much higher ratio of jobs that its 15 million', 'did not get any rise', and 'in the nutshell' (instead of 'in a nutshell'). Spelling and word formation errors also appear, such as 'secotr'. While communication is not impeded and the vocabulary is minimally sufficient to describe the trends, the lack of precision and frequent lexical slips keep this criterion at a Band 5.5 level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, attempting connectors like 'whereas', 'meanwhile', and 'if we talk about'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak. There are frequent errors in verb tense consistency (e.g., 'has much higher ratio', 'start to rise', 'reaches') and punctuation is largely neglected, with run-on sentences and missing capitalization at the beginning of sentences and for proper nouns ('US'). Preposition and article errors are also common (e.g., 'in four sector', 'of US'). These persistent errors occasionally cause strain for the reader, though the core meaning remains recoverable.

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