Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates tyhe number of employment in four different sectors in the US.The graph represents the economy as well. This economy changes are different from [redacted phone]. The sectors include the Manufacturing, Retail,Agriculture and Health care.

As describing the manufacturing sector firsrtly it experiences an increase in the first interval from 1960 to 1980. A major change is absorbed which is as the economy increases from 15 millions to 20 millions. But then a gradual decrease is observed which varies from the first one as of the 1980 to 2000. And after that in the 2020 era as well this decrease continues.

Secondly talking about the retail sector an overall increased was attained through the whole economy. As it starts from the 6 million to 10 millions in the first years 1960 to 1980 . In the next twenty years this increase continues from ten millions to fifteen millions and also an increase of one million in the last twenty years.

Now looking at the graph of the agricultural sector an overall decrease happens. The change starts from the six millions and decreases to three million in the next twenty years and it remains the same in the next twenty years from 1980 to 2000. Then a decrease also counted in the last twenty years which was two millions in 2000 to 2020.

Lastly knowing about the healthcare sector the economy goes on increasing which continues throughout the years. This increase was observed from 1960 in which the job opportunities were two million but it goes on increasing from five million and gain its peak in the 2020 as it offers the 16 million jobs in healthcare department.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The student attempts to cover all four sectors across the given time period (1960-2020) and successfully reports major trends and data points. For example, the student notes that manufacturing experienced an increase to 20 million in 1980 before declining, and correctly highlights that healthcare rose to 16 million by 2020. However, the overview is somewhat fragmented and informal, blending personal commentary ('The graph represents the economy as well') rather than presenting a cohesive summary of the main trends. Furthermore, some data points are slightly imprecise (e.g., stating healthcare started at 'two million' and went to 'five million', though the 1960 figure is around 2 million and 1980 is 5 million, which is mostly accurate, but phrasing is repetitive). Overall, the response addresses the prompt adequately, earning a Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay is divided into paragraphs for each sector, which gives it a logical framework and basic structure. However, progression within paragraphs and overall cohesion are frequently awkward and mechanical. Phrases such as 'As describing the manufacturing sector firsrtly', 'Secondly talking about the retail sector', and 'Lastly knowing about the healthcare sector' are overly conversational and heavy-handed transitions. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, and punctuation errors disrupt the flow of sentences. There is a lack of sophisticated or seamless cohesive devices, which places this performance firmly in the Band 5.5 to 6.0 range.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range to communicate basic information about the graph, utilizing words such as 'sector', 'interval', 'gradual decrease', and 'peak'. However, there are numerous lexical errors, awkward word choices, and typos throughout the text, such as 'tyhe' for the, 'increased' used instead of increase ('an overall increased was attained'), and 'counted' instead of recorded ('a decrease also counted'). The repetition of basic verbs ('goes on increasing', 'remains the same') limits lexical flexibility, restricting the score to Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. There are frequent structural errors, run-on sentences, and awkward clause constructions, such as 'A major change is absorbed which is as the economy increases from 15 millions to 20 millions' and 'This increase was observed from 1960 in which the job opportunities were two million but it goes on increasing from five million and gain its peak in the 2020'. Pluralisation and article usage are also inconsistent ('the six millions', 'two million'). These persistent errors frequently cause difficulty for the reader, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptors.

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