Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph chart illustrates the information about the frequency of jobs in four sector of the economy in the US between [redacted phone].

Overall, the graph shows time period in years, [redacted phone] and jobs in millions. The four specific jobs are given. Manufacturing jobs remains at the peak and then dropped. Retail and healthcare grown parallel whereas, the agriculture did not showed any progress.

Innitially, the significant number of jobs secured by manufacturing department in 1960 moved upward from 15-20 millions till 1980, then dropped dramatically and stood at 13 millions in 2020. Whearas, the agriculture department dropped slightly from 6-3 millions from year [redacted phone] then remained constant till 2020.

While, the deaprtment of healthcare and the retail market uprised side by side with the differences of 4 millions approximately, between them. But in 2000 retail market stood at 15 millions and raised a few till 2020, whearas, the heathcare department increased gradually throughout from [redacted phone] and intersect the graph of the retail in 2020 at 17 millions.

To conclude, manufactring department was at highest point in 1960 but deacread in 2020 and both retail and the healthcare raised from a few to 17 millions till 2020, whereas, agriculture remained at lowest throughout the time period [redacted phone].

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The student covers all four sectors (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare) across the given period (1960-2020) and presents an overview of the main trends. Key features are reported, such as manufacturing peaking in 1980 before declining, and healthcare and retail rising over time while agriculture remained low. However, there are some inaccuracies in reporting specific data points, such as stating that healthcare and retail intersect at 17 million in 2020 (when retail is closer to 16 and healthcare to 16/17), and a minor misreading of the initial year in the conclusion (writing 1060). The overview is also slightly repetitive in its phrasing. Overall, the response addresses the task adequately, earning a Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is logically organized into an introduction, overview, two body paragraphs, and a concluding summary, showing a clear attempt at paragraphing. Cohesive devices such as 'While', 'Whearas', and 'To conclude' are employed to guide the reader through the data, although spelling errors like 'Innitially' and 'Whearas' slightly disrupt the flow. Referencing is generally understandable, but some sentences feel slightly disjointed due to punctuation issues and mechanical transitions. Overall progression is present, fitting the descriptors for Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, successfully using terms related to economic sectors ('manufacturing department', 'retail market', 'healthcare') and trend language ('dropped dramatically', 'increased gradually', 'remained constant'). However, there are notable spelling errors ('frequency' used instead of 'number/amount', 'Innitially', 'Whearas', 'deaprtment', 'manufactring', 'deacread') and some awkward collocations ('jobs secured by manufacturing department'). While these lexical inaccuracies and spelling mistakes are noticeable, they do not severely impede communication, placing the response securely at Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

A mix of simple and complex sentence forms is attempted, such as 'While, the deaprtment of healthcare and the retail market uprised side by side...'. There are frequent grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Manufacturing jobs remains', 'agriculture did not showed'), incorrect prepositions ('in four sector', 'with the differences of'), and structural awkwardness. Although these errors occur regularly, the meaning remains mostly clear to the reader, aligning well with the Band 5.5 to 6.0 range, with a final score of 5.5 due to the density of mechanical errors.

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