Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates financial market in four different workplacement such as manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in United States from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, there is a remarable rise and fall seen in the job market till 2020. In which Manufacturing was the only touch highest in all,still with Agriculture face downfall in market while Retaila and Healthcare were on constant escalation.
Retail and Healthcare dramatically increase with time hence there initials at 1960 were over 5 and 1 million jobs which projected to 15 million in 2020.At the mid of 2000 Retail speed slows down but still meet exactly on a same spot with Healthcare.
While in the late 60s Manufacturing and Agriculture starting point were already high 15 million and above 5 million. At start it was moving forward but 1980 year was a game changer for them both with constantly dropping.In between them Agriculture sector was already declining in market since start to the 2020 for both.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main trends in the four sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is attempted, stating that there was a rise and fall in the job market, though it is somewhat vague and expressed with grammatical awkwardness ('Manufacturing was the only touch highest in all'). Key features are identified, such as the growth in Retail and Healthcare and the decline in Agriculture. However, the reporting of data is imprecise and sometimes confusingly phrased, such as 'initials at 1960 were over 5 and 1 million jobs which projected to 15 million in 2020', which misrepresents the starting points for Retail and Healthcare. Overall, the task is addressed, but the lack of precision and awkward expression limit the effectiveness of the report, placing it at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The text is divided into four paragraphs, attempting an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by poor sentence construction and weak cohesive ties. Phrases like 'In which Manufacturing was the only touch highest' and 'hence there initials at 1960' create confusion rather than smooth transitions. Referencing is often unclear, making it difficult to follow which data points are being compared. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion of the paragraphs is weak and repetitive, resulting in a Band 5.0 for this criterion.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is very limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent word-formation and word-choice errors, such as 'workplacement' instead of 'sectors', 'remarable' (spelling error), 'Retaila', 'initials' instead of 'initial figures', and 'downfall in market'. While the candidate attempts some less common vocabulary ('escalation', 'dramatically increase'), these attempts are marred by inaccurate collocations and grammatical forms. The lexical control is insufficient for higher bands, causing strain for the reader, and is appropriately scored at Band 4.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response displays a very limited range of structures, and attempts at complex sentences are heavily flawed and frequently ungrammatical. Examples include 'In which Manufacturing was the only touch highest in all,still with Agriculture face downfall in market' and 'At the mid of 2000 Retail speed slows down but still meet exactly on a same spot with Healthcare.' There are persistent errors in subject-verb agreement, tense usage, prepositions, and sentence boundaries. These errors frequently impede communication and obscure the meaning of the data, warranting a Band 4.5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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