Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the percentage of number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in United States from 1960 to 2020. Healthcare and Retail sectors both were hold the top position over the periods, whereas they started with lower rate. On the other hand Manufacturing group started with higher rate and held the third positions end of the period. Agriculture group also showed downtrend.

In 1960, 15% people worked for manufacturing and increased at 20% by 1980, after that decreased rapidly at around 13% in 2020. On the other hand retail worker group showed constantly growing trend from just over 5% in 1969 to 15% in 2000, after that increased slightly at just over 15% by end of the year, while healthcare group showed frequently rising trend from approximately 2% to just over 15% over the time period, while started from lowest rate and held highest proportion.

Agriculture worker group experienced different trend ,started at just over 5% in 1960 and decreased rapidly at approximately 3% by 1980 then remained stable over the twenty years and again dropped slightly at about 2% in 2020.

Overall, Healthcare worker group started with lower rate and held highest proportion and Retail worker group also held highest higher rate, where started second position. manufacturing group started with top position and held second position.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover all four sectors across the given period, but it is heavily flawed by a major misconception regarding the units of measurement. The student repeatedly refers to the data as percentages (e.g., '15% people worked') when the chart measures absolute numbers in millions. Furthermore, there are several inaccurate readings of the data, such as claiming the retail sector started in 1969 instead of 1960, and stating that healthcare and retail both held the 'top position' while simultaneously noting different ending figures. While an overview is attempted in the introduction and conclusion, the misinterpretation of the y-axis units and specific data inaccuracies prevent the response from achieving a higher band. It meets the minimum length requirement, but the conceptual errors pull the task achievement score down.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response is organized into four paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs detailing specific sectors, and a concluding summary. Logical progression is attempted, but it is frequently undermined by awkward phrasing and repetitive use of transition words like 'On the other hand' and 'while'. Paragraphing is used, but the internal cohesion of sentences is sometimes faulty, making it difficult to follow the comparisons smoothly. Referencing between ideas is not always clear, particularly in the concluding paragraph where the summary becomes confusing and contradictory regarding which sector held the top position. Overall cohesion feels mechanical rather than natural.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical range is quite limited and repetitive, with frequent reliance on basic verbs and adjectives such as 'started', 'held', 'increased', and 'decreased'. The persistent error of treating the numerical data in millions as percentages ('15% people worked') demonstrates a fundamental misunderstanding of the task data. There are also noticeable word choice and collocation issues, such as 'lower rate', 'higher rate', and 'frequently rising trend' where terms like 'proportion', 'number', or 'steadily' would be more appropriate. While the vocabulary is adequate to convey a basic summary, these recurring lexical inaccuracies and restricted range place it firmly in Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but attempts at complex sentences frequently contain grammatical errors or awkward phrasing. Examples include missing prepositions and poor clause linkage, such as 'Healthcare and Retail sectors both were hold the top position' (passive/active confusion and incorrect verb form) and 'Agriculture worker group experienced different trend ,started at just over 5%'. Punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after commas and run-on structures, are also present. While communication is not entirely impeded, errors are frequent enough to detract from the overall clarity of the writing.

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