Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates information about the number of jobs across four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020
Overall, The number of jobs in retail increased gradually, while the jobs in agriculture declined despite some fluctuations. The jobs in healthcare increased steadily over the period. in addition the manufacturing jobs experienced highest figure in 1960.
in 1960 healthcare jobs accounted least figure at 2, which is continously increased over the period and in 2020 healthcare jobs have highest figure followed by retail at 16. Manufacturing accounted highest jobs in 1960 which rose to figure at 20 in 1980, then it experienced a gradually declined at 13 in 2020.
in 1960 the number of jobs in retail at 5, then the figure regularly increased and become highest figure in 2020 at 16 followed by healthcare. The number of jobs in agriculture steadily declined over the period despite some fluctuations, in 1996 the figure 6 and in 2020 at 20
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response covers all parts of the task by reporting the main trends and making comparisons across the four sectors. However, there are some noticeable factual inaccuracies and confusions regarding the data. For instance, the student states that manufacturing 'experienced highest figure in 1960' when it actually peaked at 20 million in 1980. Furthermore, in the final paragraph, the data for agriculture contains severe errors, claiming the figure in 1996 was 6 and in 2020 was 20, whereas the graph shows agricultural employment starting at 6 in 1960 and dropping to 2 by 2020 (with no 1996 data points given). These inaccuracies pull the task achievement score down to Band 5.5, as the reporting of data is not always accurate.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response is arranged into four paragraphs, including an introduction and an overall summary. There is a basic attempt to sequence ideas logically. However, cohesive devices are frequently mechanical or inaccurate, and referencing is sometimes unclear, such as abrupt transitions like 'in addition the manufacturing jobs' and repeated lower-case sentence beginnings ('in 1960 healthcare jobs...', 'in 1960 the number of jobs...'). Paragraphing is present, but the internal progression within body paragraphs lacks smooth cohesive control. Overall, the organizational structure meets the criteria for Band 6.0, as there is a coherent overall arrangement despite faulty cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to convey basic trends, employing terms such as 'increased gradually', 'declined', and 'fluctuations'. However, the range is limited and repetitive, and there are frequent word-choice and collocation errors, such as 'accounted least figure', 'continously increased', 'highest jobs', and 'gradually declined at 13' instead of 'declined to 13'. These errors reflect a Band 5.0 level where vocabulary is minimally adequate for the task, but noticeable lexical inaccuracies cause some difficulty and strain for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student attempts some complex structures, such as relative clauses ('which is continously increased') and subordinate clauses, but these are often marked by grammatical errors. There are frequent missing verbs, incorrect prepositions, and persistent punctuation and capitalization issues (e.g., starting sentences with 'in 1960' in lower case, omitting verbs like 'was' in 'the figure 6'). Simple sentences are handled better, but frequent errors in grammar and tense consistency place this response firmly in the Band 5.0 category, where frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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