Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line chart illustrates the number of jobs in four areas, Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture,Healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Retail and Healthcare sectors increased dramatically, while Manufacturing showed the steady decline. Agriculture remained the lowest.

In 1960, Manufacturing started around at 15 million and significantly rose to 20 million at its peak in 1980, after this it fell sharply remaning years and reached at around 13 million. In 1960, Agriculture started over 5 million, after this showed decline and reached at apporximately 4 million, and reamin almost same end of the period.

In 1960, Healthcare and Retail started initially around 2.5 million and over 5 million respectively, both showed the steady rise. Retail reached at 15 million in 2000 and then remain almost same, while Healthcare increaed over 15 million, and these both are the highest at the end of period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The student has attempted all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making comparisons across the four economic sectors. An overview is present, highlighting the general trends that Retail and Healthcare increased while Manufacturing declined. However, there are some inaccuracies in reporting the data: for instance, Manufacturing peaked in 1980 at 20 million, but the student states it started around 15 million in 1960 and 'significantly rose to 20 million' (it was indeed 15 in 1960, so this part is correct, but 'remaning years' has minor imprecision). Furthermore, Agriculture is stated to start 'over 5 million' in 1960, whereas the data shows it started at 6 million. Additionally, the response is under-length at 144 words, which incurs a penalty on Task Achievement. Consequently, the score is Band 5.5.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is organised into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview, and then body paragraphs detailing specific sectors. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', and 'while'. However, progression is sometimes hindered by clunky transitions, such as 'after this it fell sharply remaning years'. Referencing and substitution are generally clear, though paragraphing and transitions could be smoother to ensure a more seamless flow. Overall arrangement is coherent, fitting Band 6 descriptors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, including terms such as 'sector', 'dramatically', 'peak', and 'significantly'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors, such as 'remaning' instead of 'remaining', 'apporximately' instead of 'approximately', and 'reamin' instead of 'remain'. These errors do not impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score to Band 6.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'Overall, Retail and Healthcare sectors increased dramatically, while Manufacturing showed the steady decline.' There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing throughout, including 'started around at 15 million', 'showed decline', and 'remain almost same end of the period'. Punctuation is also slightly flawed with missing spaces after commas (e.g., 'Agriculture,Healthcare'). These errors occur frequently in complex structures, placing the performance securely in Band 5.0.

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