Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates changes in the proportions of workers employed in four different sectors—manufacturing, healthcare, retail and agriculture—from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, manufacturing and healthcare experienced declining trends over the period, while employment in retail and agriculture generally increased. Manufacturing showed the most noticeable fall, whereas retail became increasingly important towards the end of the period.

In 1960, manufacturing accounted for a relatively large proportion of employment, but its share gradually decreased over the following decades. Healthcare also declined, although its reduction was less dramatic. By contrast, retail employment rose steadily throughout much of the period and became one of the largest sources of employment by 2020. Agriculture followed an upward trend as well, despite some fluctuations during the period.

Overall, the graph demonstrates a clear shift in employment away from manufacturing and healthcare towards retail and agriculture over the sixty-year period. and this show how job increase.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The student attempts to summarise the main features of the chart, but there are significant factual errors in trend identification. The overview and body paragraphs state that manufacturing and healthcare experienced declining trends, and retail and agriculture generally increased. However, according to the visual data, manufacturing actually rose sharply from 15 to 20 million before declining, and healthcare experienced a massive continuous increase from 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020. Conversely, agriculture decreased from 6 million to 2 million. Consequently, the data is severely misread. Furthermore, the response falls just short of the 150-word minimum at 149 words, which results in a penalty under Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is organised into four paragraphs, including a clear introduction and an overall summary. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', and 'By contrast' are used to connect ideas logically. However, the mechanical ending 'and this show how job increase' disrupts the flow and reveals a fragmented final sentence structure. Paragraphing is generally appropriate for an overview task, and information flows reasonably well despite the conceptual errors in the content.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range suitable for describing economic sectors and trends, using terms such as 'proportions of workers employed', 'gradually decreased', and 'upward trend'. However, there is some inaccurate terminology caused by the data misinterpretation, and the use of 'proportions' is incorrect since the chart displays absolute numbers in millions rather than percentages. The final sentence contains a basic vocabulary slip ('job increase' instead of 'jobs increased').

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'Manufacturing showed the most noticeable fall, whereas retail became increasingly important towards the end of the period.' There are a few noticeable grammatical errors, particularly the sentence fragment and agreement error at the very end: 'and this show how job increase.' Despite these errors, communication is generally not impeded for the most part, and punctuation is largely correct.

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