Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The graph given illustrate detail about the number of jobs in 4 fields of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2022.
over all, The job have been divded in four fields of the wealth in the US.but,it is described jobs in million and job years.
look at the fogure,It is detail about manufacturing, Retail, agriculture and health care.job of the year In 1960 no cahnge just 0million , and next year 1980 job grow 5 million.it has no change further, in century 2000 jump 10 million its other levels about 2000 is very rise.Finally, 2020 job economy surge 15 million .above on other values.comparison, the other sector 5 million dip in 1960, because, other year not jump in any year but,2020 year decline 15 million overview,2000 years slump 15 to 5 million.look at the figure, job in 15 miilion overall rocket in 1980 goup 20 million. but, 15 million tumble 2000.Finally,job is 15 million going down in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response attempts to address the task by mentioning some of the economic sectors shown in the graph, such as manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare, and provides some figures for the years 1960 and 2020. However, the data reported is frequently inaccurate, confused, and hard to follow (e.g., stating 'job of the year In 1960 no cahnge just 0 million'). The overview attempted is disjointed and does not accurately capture the main overall trends, such as the significant rise in healthcare and retail compared to the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. Key comparisons between the sectors are largely missed or poorly communicated due to unclear phrasing. This corresponds to a band score of 4.0, as the response touches upon the prompt but contains significant misinterpretations of the data and lacks a coherent overview.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The response lacks logical organisation and clear progression. There is no proper paragraph structure, with all sentences lumped together into a single, dense block of text, which severely impacts readability. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, and referencing is unclear ('the other sector 5 million dip in 1960, because, other year not jump in any year'). Transitions between sentences and ideas feel abrupt and mechanical, making it very difficult for the reader to follow the train of thought. Furthermore, punctuation is erratic, causing further disruption to the flow. These issues reflect the descriptors for a band 4.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple words like 'job', 'year', 'fields', and 'economy'. There are frequent inappropriate word choices and collocations that reveal a limited lexical range, such as 'wealth' used instead of 'sectors' or 'economy', and 'century 2000 jump 10 million its other levels about 2000 is very rise'. Spelling mistakes and word formation errors also appear throughout the text ('illustrate', 'divded', 'fogure', 'cahnge'). Because the vocabulary is restricted and imprecise, it strains the reader's understanding, fitting the band 4.0 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. There is a very limited range of sentence structures, and attempts at more complex or compound sentences result in severe structural errors, fragments, and run-on sentences (e.g., 'Finally, 2020 job economy surge 15 million .above on other values.comparison, the other sector 5 million dip in 1960, because, other year not jump in any year'). Subject-verb agreement errors, missing auxiliary verbs, and incorrect tense usage are pervasive ('The graph given illustrate', 'job grow', 'job is 15 million going down'). These frequent, heavy errors distort meaning and place a significant burden on the reader, aligning with band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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