Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph compares the shares of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail and healthcare experienced a significant rise in the job count whereas manufacturing and agriculture showed a gradual decrease throughout the given period of time.

In the provided information, retail was one of the least popular sectors with approximately 5.1 million jobs in 1960 that soared to 15 million by 2000 and by the end of 2020 it slightly increased above 15. Healthcare on the other hand, surged in the given time. In 1960, it was barely above 2 million though it witnessed its peak above 15 million in 2020.

Conversely, agriculture jobs were acquired by a few individuals in 1960 roughly around 5.1 million same as retail, but it plummeted below 4 by 1980 and plateaued till 2000 and started decreasing gradually again by the end of 2020. In contrast, manufacturing was at peak among four sectors in 1960 with 15 million shares that skyrocketed to 20 million in 1980 but after that it plunged to below 14 million by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features, trends, and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. The overview provided in the second paragraph accurately captures the main trends, noting that retail and healthcare rose significantly while manufacturing and agriculture declined. Key data points are correctly cited, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare surging to 16 million in 2020. The student avoids copying the prompt verbatim and presents a well-rounded summary of the visual data. Overall, the requirements of Task Achievement are thoroughly fulfilled.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a clear logical organization and progression throughout. Information is grouped logically by sector trends, separating the growing sectors (retail and healthcare) from the declining ones (agriculture and manufacturing). Cohesive devices such as 'whereas', 'Conversely', and 'In contrast' are used effectively to signal comparisons and contrasts between the data points. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with a clear introduction, an overview, and distinct body paragraphs for the body content. Cohesion is managed well, ensuring the reader can easily follow the progression of information.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates a sufficient and flexible range of vocabulary suited to academic report writing, using terms such as 'soared', 'surged', 'plummeted', and 'plateaued'. There is an awareness of collocation and style, although some minor inaccuracies occur, such as writing 'jobs were acquired by a few individuals' when describing agriculture employment, which is slightly unnatural for describing statistical data. However, the vocabulary is varied enough to allow for precise reporting of trends and figures without impeding communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The response features a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating relative clauses and subordinate clauses effectively (e.g., 'retail was one of the least popular sectors with approximately 5.1 million jobs in 1960 that soared to 15 million by 2000'). There are frequent error-free sentences, and grammar control is generally sound. Minor errors do occur, such as a missing comma before dependent clauses or slightly awkward phrasing, but these do not impede communication at all and reflect a solid command of sentence formation.

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