Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in different sector of the economy in the us from 1960 to 2020.
overall,the retail and healthcare were inctrased throught the period. while,manufacturing was fluctuating all over the period .However,Agriculture fallen steadily.
In 1960,the jobs in retail were rose from 7% and in 2000 reached at 15% and then rise 2% in 2020 and piked 17%.whereas the jobs in healthcare were increased stadily .In 1960 2 million jobs in healthcare and 12 percentage points in 2000 after that reached at 17 millions in 2020.
The jobs in manufacturing were fluctuating over the period.in addition,in 1960 the manufacturing was 15 million and then rised to 20 million before falling in 1980,then falled to 12 million in final year.In contrast,agriculture was fall from 7 to 2 million in 2020.In 1960,agriculture was 7 million and then dropped 3 million in 1980 and reached 2 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The student attempts to cover all parts of the prompt by describing the overall trends and specific data points for the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are notable inaccuracies in reporting the data. For example, the writer claims that 'jobs in retail were rose from 7% and in 2000 reached at 15%', confusing millions with percentages, and later states 'manufacturing was 15 million and then rised to 20 million before falling in 1980,then falled to 12 million in final year', which misinterprets the 1980 peak. The overview identifies some broad trends, but overall the task response is weakened by data misinterpretations and confusing numeric expressions, placing it at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response attempts a basic structure with an introduction, an overview sentence, and body paragraphs. However, paragraphing is extremely poor, with multiple sentences run together into block paragraphs lacking proper visual separation. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or incorrectly, such as starting sentences with 'overall,the' without proper capitalization and spacing, and using contrast markers like 'whereas' and 'In contrast' in places where the logical relationship is confused. The overall progression is disjointed, leading to a Band 5.0 for coherence and cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple terms like 'jobs', 'sector', 'increased', and 'fell'. There are also frequent lexical and collocation errors, such as confusing 'percentage points' with millions ('12 percentage points in 2000') and mixing up word forms ('were inctrased throught', 'Agriculture fallen'). The student attempts some less common vocabulary ('fluctuating', 'steadily'), but errors in word choice and spelling ('inctrased', 'piked', 'falled', 'rised') cause noticeable strain for the reader, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'while,manufacturing was fluctuating all over the period'. However, control over grammatical structures and tense consistency is very weak. There are frequent tense errors (e.g., 'were rose', 'were increased stadily', 'agriculture was fall'), missing articles, and punctuation issues. Errors are frequent and often impede smooth reading comprehension, although the general topic remains discernable. This corresponds to a Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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