Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrating the number of jobs, in four sectors which includes manufacturing, retail, agriculture and health care of the economy in the US from [redacted phone]. The line graph depicting that manufacturing sector surge rapidly from 15 millions to 20 millions number of jobs offered between [redacted phone], then from [redacted phone] number of jobs related to manufacturing sectors goes decline below 15 millions job vacancy. Whereas, the retailing sector initially has 5 millions jobs in 1960 and the number increases to 15 millions jobs in 2000 and become intermediate towards the end in 2020. The agricultural sector from the beginning in 1960 it shows a rapid decline in jobs from 5 millions to 3 millions in 1980 and this sectors economy in US remains the same in the next years. The last sector healthcare, the line graph shows a gradual and rapid increase in number of jobs from 3 millions jobs in 1960 to 15 millions in 2020.

This graph illustrates that healthcare sector in the coming years has more jobs opportunities than any other sector. whereas, in contrast to this agriculture sector in US is under threat. Retailing sector is the one which shows drastic changes from [redacted phone] years and until 2020 it demands stops at 15 millions jobs. The manufacturing sector initially from [redacted phone] it was at the peak from remaining sectors of US economy but in later year's it

dramatically falls.

In conclusion of the graph analysis the healthcare sector of US has more job opportunities than remaining sectors and it will be rising in the next years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors shown in the graph and attempts to report key features and make comparisons. An overview is present at the beginning of the second paragraph and in the conclusion. However, there are notable inaccuracies in reading the data; for example, the student states that manufacturing went from '15 millions to 20 millions' then 'below 15 millions', and describes healthcare starting at '3 millions jobs in 1960' when the graph shows around 2 million. Additionally, some statements drift into speculation, such as predicting the future ('healthcare sector in the coming years has more jobs opportunities') which is not strictly required or based on the visual data. These limitations place the response at Band 5.5.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The text is organized into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs discussing the sectors, and a conclusion. However, the logical progression is hindered by awkward transitions and run-on sentences, such as 'The line graph illustrating the number of jobs...' which lacks a main verb and is treated as a sentence fragment. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or misused (e.g., 'Whereas, in contrast to this agriculture sector...'). Paragraphing is attempted, but the overall flow feels disjointed and lacks sophisticated cohesion. This aligns with Band 5.0 descriptors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student attempts to use vocabulary related to data trends, such as 'surge rapidly', 'decline', and 'gradual and rapid increase'. However, there are frequent inappropriate word choices and collocations, such as 'number of jobs offered', 'become intermediate towards the end', and 'demands stops at 15 millions jobs'. Word formation errors also occur, such as 'retailing sector' (instead of retail) and 'health care'. The range is sufficient to communicate basic points, but lexical control is weak, supporting a Band 5.0 score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but many of the complex attempts are grammatically faulty. There are several severe errors in basic sentence construction, such as the opening sentence lacking a finite verb ('The line graph illustrating the number of jobs...'). Other errors include subject-verb agreement issues ('this sectors economy... remains') and incorrect prepositions and tense usage ('in later year's it dramatically falls'). Punctuation is also erratic, with lowercase letters starting sentences. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader, fitting Band 5.0.

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