Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The provided line graph illustrates the data about number of jobs in four sectors including manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare of the economic system in the US from 1960 to 2020. The units are measured in millions.

Overall, number of jobs in manufactuing sector remained substantially higher for most of the timeframe and decline steadily throughout the end and was overtaken by job opportuniteis in retail and healthcare sector. Furthermore, job opportunities in agriculture initially were higher than agriculture but the number remained going down.

The number of jobs in manufacturing sector was 15 million in 1960, climbing up to its peak at 20 million in 1980, fell down to around 17 million in 2000 and remaiend the highest throughout 40 year timeframe, before eventually being overtaken by retail and healthcare and finishing at 13 million in 2020. Retail sector was around 6 million in 1960, followed an upward trend reaching 10 million in 1980, rose up to 15 million in 2000 and finished around 16 million after surpassing manufacturing sector.

The number of job opportunities in healthcare sector were around 2.5 million in 1960, the lowest among all in that year, experienced an increase surpassing agriculture around 4 million, reached 5 million in 1980 and followed a steady increase, finishing at the same point as retail around 16 million after surpassing manufacturing in 2020. In contrast, agriculture started off at around 6 million, declined to 3 million in 1980, plateaued till 2000 and just dfell off a bit to finish around 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and trends of the four sectors over the given 60-year period. An appropriate overview is provided in the second paragraph, highlighting the dominance of manufacturing and its eventual overtaking by retail and healthcare. Key data points are accurately cited, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and agriculture declining steadily to around 2 million by 2020. The comparisons between sectors are well-drawn, although there is a slight slip in the overview sentence where agriculture is mistakenly referenced instead of manufacturing when describing initial relative sizes. Overall, the content is comprehensive and accurately reflects the provided visual data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is logically organized with a clear overall progression from the introduction to the overview, followed by detailed body paragraphs that logically group the sectors. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different sections of the analysis. Cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'before eventually being overtaken', and 'In contrast' are used effectively to guide the reader through the data, although referencing and transitions occasionally feel slightly mechanical, such as the repetitive use of sentence structures beginning with 'The number of jobs...'. Despite these minor flaws, the essay maintains a clear logical flow throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary suitable for an Academic Task 1 response, employing terms like 'substantially higher', 'steadily', 'upward trend', and 'plateaued'. However, there are a few lexical inaccuracies and spelling errors, such as 'manufactuing' instead of 'manufacturing', 'opportuniteis' instead of 'opportunities', and the awkward phrase 'dfell off a bit'. Less common lexical items are attempted with mixed success. While communication is never impeded, these occasional errors prevent the response from achieving a higher band score in this category.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, utilizing relative clauses, participial phrases ('before eventually being overtaken'), and coordinate clauses effectively. There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings present throughout the text, such as missing articles ('the data about number of jobs', 'retail and healthcare sector'), minor subject-verb agreement issues ('opportunities in healthcare sector were'), and preposition choices ('throughout the end'). However, these errors do not impede communication, and the majority of complex structures retain good control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.