Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the information related to job oppurtunities in four sectors which are based on economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.
Overall, retail and healthcare sector are showing upward trend with time and reached at the same point in 2020 and the manufacturing sector starts progress till 1980 but after that time period it showed the decline growth. Agriculture sector is representing the lower trend as time passes and there is no upward growth till 2020.
In 1960, retail sector and agriculture sector stood at 6 million jobs but as time passed retail sector showed progress a figured at 16 million jobs in 2020 but agriculture sector followed the poor progress and reached at 3 million jobs.
Manufacturing sector showed progress from 1960 to 1980 and catched the 5 million job oppurtunity but after 1980 the progress changed the path and fall down in terms of job number and reached at 13 million jobs in 2020. Healthcare sector figured out a nice trend in term of success and created the 16 million jobs in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student successfully addresses the main features of the task by reporting data across all four economic sectors over the sixty-year period. An overview is provided, noting the upward trends for retail and healthcare, the downward trend for agriculture, and the fluctuating path of manufacturing. However, there are minor inaccuracies in data interpretation and reporting; for instance, the student states that manufacturing 'catched the 5 million job oppurtunity' between 1960 and 1980, whereas the graph shows it rose from 15 million to 20 million (an increase of 5 million, not a total of 5 million). Furthermore, the final manufacturing figure is stated as 13 million, which is accurate, but some comparisons lack precise data integration. Overall, the main trends are adequately covered, placing this response at Band 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response is arranged coherently with a logical four-paragraph structure comprising an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs focusing on different sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', and 'but as time passed' are used to guide the reader through the data. However, referencing and cohesion are occasionally faulty or mechanical, as seen in awkward transitions like 'after that time period it showed the decline growth' and repetitive sentence openings. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different groupings of data, ensuring the overall progression is clear, meeting the criteria for Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to economic sectors and trends, such as 'upward trend', 'decline growth', and 'job opportunities'. However, there are frequent word choice and spelling errors, such as 'oppurtunities', 'figured at' instead of 'stood at', and 'decline growth' instead of 'declining growth' or 'a decline'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with some inaccuracy, and awkward collocations appear throughout the text. These lexical errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the response from achieving a higher band, justifying a score of 5.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The student demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating conjunctions and relative clauses, such as 'sectors which are based on economy in the US'. There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings throughout the text, including 'reached at the same point', 'started progress till 1980', and 'catched the 5 million job oppurtunity'. Punctuation and verb tense consistency are also problematic in places, such as mixing present and past tenses ('are showing', 'stands', 'showed'). Although these errors do not severely impede understanding, they occur frequently enough to warrant a Band 5.5.
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