Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs people do in the USA in four sectors: Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the retail and healthcare jobs sectors increased over the time while manufacturing and agriculture experienced a down trend.

The retail jobs sector faced a significant increase between 1960 and 2000, begining at 6 million and reached at around 15 million, before facing a slow rise until 2020, with more than 15 million. The healthcare job sector faced a similar trend, starting around 2 million in 1960 and a jump to above 15 million in 2020.

On the other hand, the agriculture industry faced a downward trend, which slowly fell to around 2 million in 2020. Meanwhile, the manufacturing sector experienced a significant increase from 1960 to 1980 and peaked at 20 million, then it faced a dramatic decline over the following 40 years and it fell to around 13 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by providing a clear overview and reporting the main trends and features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key data points are correctly cited, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare rising significantly to around 16 million by 2020. Comparisons are made between growing and declining sectors. However, there is a minor inaccuracy regarding the healthcare sector's trend description, as the student states it faced a 'similar trend' to retail starting from 1960, whereas healthcare actually started much lower at around 2 million compared to retail's 6 million, though both ultimately ended at 16 million. Overall, the content covers the visual data well and fulfills the requirements of Task 1 adequately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is arranged into a logical structure with a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs focusing on contrasting trends. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Overall', 'before facing a slow rise', 'On the other hand', and 'Meanwhile'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the increasing sectors from the decreasing ones. However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'faced a' (e.g., 'faced a significant increase', 'faced a similar trend'). While logical progression is maintained throughout, these minor cohesion limitations place this response securely at Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, incorporating appropriate topic-specific terms such as 'manufacturing sector', 'retail jobs sector', 'agriculture industry', and 'healthcare job sector'. Less common lexical items are attempted, including 'down trend', 'dramatic decline', and 'significant increase'. However, there are some word choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as 'number of jobs people do' instead of 'number of jobs', 'begining' (spelling error), and awkward phrases like 'reached at around 15 million' (confusing 'reached' with 'arrived at'). These minor errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the score from reaching Band 7.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and subordinate structures successfully (e.g., 'The retail jobs sector faced a significant increase between 1960 and 2000, begining at 6 million and reached at around 15 million, before facing a slow rise until 2020...'). There are some grammatical errors, particularly tense and participle inconsistencies such as 'begining' and the unparallel verb 'and reached at'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while errors occur, they rarely impede communication. The control of grammar aligns well with the Band 6 descriptors.

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