Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.0)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs , measured in millions, of four sectors including manufacturing , retail , agriculture and healthcare in the US Economy between [redacted phone].
Overall, employment in manufacturing declined after reaching the peak in 1980, while the number of jobs in retail and healthcare increased considerably over the period . In contrast , agriculture with its great decline remained to be the smallest number of jobs in comparison to all .
Manufacturing accounted for approximately 15 million in 1960 and subsequently rose to a peak of 20 million in 1980. However employment in this sector followed a downward trend , falling to around 17 million in 2000 before reaching approximately 13 million in 2020. Retail , on the other hand , experienced a consistent growth throughout the period . It initially stood at around 6 million in 1960 , the figure increased to 10 million in 1980 and rose further upto 15 million by 2000, eventually reaching approximately 16 million in 2020.
Healthcare also recorded a substantial growth starting at approximately 2 million in 1960 , then experienced an increase at 5 million in 1980 and rose considerably upto 11 million by 2000 reaching a substantial growth of 15 million in 2020. Agriculture however followed an opposite trend , maintaining a stable decrease throughout the period . Starting at 6 million it dropped to 2 million in 1980 and 2000 and declined to 1 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.5
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An effective overall summary is included, highlighting the general trajectories of the different categories. Key data points, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and the dramatic rise of healthcare, are accurately cited and supported with figures from the graph. The response is fully developed and well-focused on the visual data provided, demonstrating a clear understanding of the trends.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0
The report displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information is appropriately grouped into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and detailed body paragraphs covering the trends logically. Cohesive devices are used effectively to guide the reader, as seen with phrases like "Overall", "In contrast", "However", and "on the other hand". Paragraphing is managed sufficiently, contributing to an overall seamless reading experience, although occasional minor punctuation lapses around commas are present.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
The student demonstrates a sufficient and generally flexible range of vocabulary suited to academic reporting. Phrases like "downward trend", "consistent growth", "substantial growth", and "stable decrease" show good lexical control and awareness of collocation. While there are some minor repetitive vocabulary choices, the lexical resource is adequate for precise description and comparison of data trends without impeding communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5
A good mix of simple and complex sentence forms is employed throughout the response. The student successfully constructs compound and complex structures, such as "Manufacturing accounted for approximately 15 million in 1960 and subsequently rose to a peak..." and "Healthcare also recorded a substantial growth starting at...". While the majority of sentences are error-free, there are minor punctuation issues, such as spacing errors before commas (e.g., "jobs , measured") and occasional awkward phrasing in participle clauses, which prevent a higher score.
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