Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph ilustrates about number of jobs in four sectors: Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare from 1960 to 2020 in US.
We can see how manufacturing started in 1960 with 15 Million jobs and now they are down in 2020 with less than the starting number.
Retail has a low start in 1960 with approximately 06 million jobs and now they are at a rising point in 2020 with more than 15 Million jobs.
Agriculture sector is the most promising and high demanding sector where every year the jobs are increasing starting from 2.5 million and now at more than 15 million jobs.
Healthcare is the sector which requires more jobs but eventually it decreases every year started from 5.1 million and now at 0.25 Million.
We can summarize the number of jobs rising and falling with the requirement of every sector. The numbers are very different in 1960 and changes in 2020 with the job demands every year.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main trends in the four sectors of the economy between 1960 and 2020. However, there are significant factual inaccuracies in reading the data from the chart, which negatively impacts Task Achievement. For instance, the student states that the Agriculture sector started from '2.5 million and now at more than 15 million jobs', whereas the graph clearly shows agriculture decreasing from 6 million to 2 million. Similarly, the description of Healthcare is reversed; the student claims it decreases from 5.1 million to 0.25 million, while the visual data actually shows a substantial increase from 2 million to 16 million. While an overview is attempted at the beginning and end, the inaccurate reporting of the core data limits the effectiveness of the response, corresponding to a Band 4.5 or 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The text is organized into short, distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs for each sector, and a brief concluding summary. However, the overall progression is somewhat mechanical, relying heavily on formulaic opening phrases like 'We can see how' and 'Retail has a low start'. Cohesive devices are minimal, and referencing is occasionally unclear (e.g., 'now they are down in 2020 with less than the starting number', where 'they' ambiguously refers to manufacturing jobs). Paragraphing is attempted, but the extreme brevity of the sections disrupts the flow. There is a lack of sophisticated cohesive linking between sentences and ideas, placing this performance firmly in the Band 5.0 range.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with several awkward collocations and word choices. For example, the student uses phrases like 'at a rising point' instead of 'rising' or 'increasing', and 'most promising and high demanding sector', which sounds unnatural in an academic context. There is also a spelling error ('ilustrates'). While the student successfully deploys some topic-specific terms like 'Manufacturing', 'Retail', 'Agriculture', and 'Healthcare', the range is limited and imprecise. The frequent reliance on simple descriptive words restricts the score to a Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'The graph ilustrates about number of jobs' (unnecessary preposition and missing article) and 'the numbers are very different in 1960 and changes in 2020' (tense inconsistency). Additionally, comma splices and run-on tendencies appear, such as in 'Healthcare is the sector which requires more jobs but eventually it decreases every year started from 5.1 million and now at 0.25 Million.' These errors frequently cause strain and confusion for the reader, aligning with the Band 5.0 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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