Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In this grap we can see about the jobs in four sectors of the economy in Us between 1960 to 2020

"Manufacture" in 1960.

In this graph we can the manufacturing is increased in "1960". And we see the manufacturing is also increased in "1980". But in " 2000" the manufacturing is decreased very badly. In "2020" we can that the manufacturing is totaly dead in "2020".

"Retail" in 1960.

In this graph we can the retail graph. In the begnning the retail was very low. But in "1980" the retail was increased. And we can also see that in 2000 was also be increased.In the last year "2020" the retail graph was come up very fast and also be increased.

"Healthcare" in 2000.

In this graph we can see the health was very low in the begnning. But in "1980" the healthcare graph was increased. And in "2000" also be increased. And in the last year they were increased in 2020.

Agriculture in "2020".

In this graph we can see that in benning year "1960" the agriculture graph was good. But in "1980" the agriculture graph is decreased. And the middle year "2000" they down badly. But in "2020" totaly dead

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response attempts to address the task by mentioning the four economic sectors across the given timeframe. However, the data reporting is highly inaccurate and misinterprets the graph significantly. For instance, the writer claims that manufacturing was totally dead in 2020, whereas the chart shows it remained at approximately 13 million jobs. Furthermore, there is no proper overview provided, and the structure is fragmented into broken bullet-point-style headers rather than a cohesive report. Ideas are heavily under-developed and lack accurate data support, falling short of Band 4 requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Coherence and cohesion are severely compromised in this response. The text lacks an overall logical progression and fails to use standard paragraphing conventions, instead relying on disjointed headings like 'Manufacture in 1960' and fragmented statements. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, with repetitive introductory phrases such as 'In this graph we can see' starting almost every sentence. Referencing is unclear, and the information is not arranged in a coherent manner, corresponding to a Band 4 level.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The lexical range is extremely basic and repetitive. The student relies heavily on simple, imprecise vocabulary such as 'good', 'low', and 'decreased very badly'. There are also lexical inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices, such as claiming a sector is 'totaly dead'. Spelling errors are present, including 'grap' for graph, 'begnning', and 'totaly'. The vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data accurately, reflecting a Band 4 performance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

Grammatical range is very limited, consisting mostly of repetitive, simple sentence structures like 'In this graph we can see...'. There are frequent errors in tense usage, sentence construction, and missing elements, such as 'we can that the manufacturing is totaly dead'. Punctuation is also erratic. These errors are frequent and occasionally cause confusion, though basic meaning is partially retrievable. This aligns with Band 4 descriptors.

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