Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrates about employment in the Us in four different fields, such as Manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare in 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the healthcare sector showed significant growth, while manufacturing increased slightly at the start but then followed a downward trend. Meanwhile, agriculture saw a marginal fall at the start and then remained unchanged throughout the period.
It is quite evident from the graph that in 1960, 15m jobs were available in the manufacturing sector, which reached 20m in 1980. This domain saw a fall in jobs and reached less than 15m in 2020. Whereas, more than 5m job opportunities were available in the retail sector, which increased gradually and reached 15m in 2000. It then remained stable with a minor increase.
Furthermore, at the start, the healthcare department offered less than 5m jobs in 1960, which tended to increase gradually and offered more than 15m jobs in 2020. On the other hand,the agriculture sector showed an opposite trend, which offered approximately 6m jobs in 1960 but started to declined and offered 3m jobs in 1980. This sector then remained stable with minor fall in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and trends of the four economic sectors over the sixty-year period. A clear overview is provided in the second paragraph, highlighting the contrasting trajectories of healthcare, manufacturing, and agriculture. Key data points are correctly identified and contrasted, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 before declining, and healthcare rising from 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in data interpretation; for instance, the text states that agriculture remained stable with a minor fall in 2020, whereas the graph indicates a continuous and significant drop from 6 million down to approximately 2 million. Despite these minor discrepancies, the response covers all required aspects well.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response exhibits a clear logical progression and is divided into logical paragraphs. The introduction sets out the scope of the graph, followed by an overview paragraph, and subsequent body paragraphs group the data logically by sector comparisons. A variety of cohesive devices are employed, such as 'Overall', 'Meanwhile', 'Whereas', and 'Furthermore', which help guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different categories of information. However, some cohesive links feel slightly mechanical, and referencing could be smoother, preventing the response from reaching the highest bands in this criterion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for an Academic Task 1 response, including terms like 'employment', 'sector', 'downward trend', 'marginal fall', and 'fluctuate equivalents'. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary such as 'domain', 'gradually', and 'stable'. However, there are some lexical inaccuracies and awkward collocations, such as 'healthcare department' instead of 'healthcare sector', and typographical errors like 'Us' instead of 'US'. Furthermore, word choices occasionally lack precision, but the vocabulary used is sufficient to communicate the main ideas without impeding the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating relative clauses and transitional phrases effectively (e.g., 'which reached 20m in 1980' and 'while manufacturing increased slightly at the start but then followed a downward trend'). Grammatical control is generally good, with frequent error-free sentences. However, there are a few noticeable errors, such as missing articles ('the Us' and 'started to declined' where the past participle or infinitive is misused), as well as occasional punctuation slips. These errors do not impede communication, placing the response solidly in the competent band.
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