Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Given ia a line graph compares the number of jobs in seleted four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, retail and healthcare job amount significantly increased while the manufacturing and agricultural jobs decreased with the gven time period.
In 1960, manufacturing industry showed the highest demand almost 15 millions and peak around 1980 by 20 millions and after that number of jobs significantly reduced up to around 13 millions. However, the highest number of jobs recorded in manufacturing industry all time. another downfall recorded in agriculture and job market started around 6% in 1960 and slowly decreased up to around 2% in 2020.
On the other hand, number of opportunities in healthcare sector and retail sector started from around 2% and 6% respectively in 1960 and it recorded as around 16% in both sectors in 2020. When comparing overall fluctuations of job market, except agriculture sector contribution to job market in the US saturated around 15 millions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided, highlighting the contrasting trends of growth in retail and healthcare versus decline in manufacturing and agriculture. Key data points are accurately cited, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and agriculture falling to around 2 million by 2020. However, the student incorrectly refers to the data units as percentages ("6%", "2%") instead of millions of jobs, which is a minor slip regarding the axis label. Overall, the response meets the core requirements of Task Achievement well, earning a solid band 6.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response is structured into an introduction, an overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs, demonstrating a clear attempt at logical organisation. Cohesive devices such as "Overall", "In 1960", "However", and "On the other hand" are used to guide the reader through the data. Progression is generally logical, though the transitions between ideas can feel slightly mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different sectors and trends. Referencing and linking are mostly clear, though occasional awkward phrasing detracts slightly from the overall flow. Based on these strengths and minor faults, a band 6.0 is awarded.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting functional terms related to trends and economic sectors, such as "significantly increased", "peak", "downfall", and "opportunities". However, there are notable lexical inaccuracies and awkward collocations, such as "Given ia a line graph compares" and using the percentage symbol (%) for millions of jobs. Words like "seleted" (selected) and "gven" (given) indicate minor spelling slips. While the vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main features of the chart, these frequent lexical and unit errors prevent the score from rising into the higher bands. A band 6.0 is appropriate here.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and coordinate structures. There are, however, several grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing articles ("Given ia a line graph compares", "manufacturing industry showed"), tense inconsistencies, and run-on sentences ("...and peak around 1980 by 20 millions and after that number of jobs significantly reduced..."). Punctuation is occasionally neglected. Despite these errors, meaning is generally clear and communication is not severely impeded. This performance aligns well with the descriptors for a band 6.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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