Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line chart illustates the number of employments in four economic sectors of thee US during the period of 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the jobs in retail and healthcare sectors increased, whereas the employment opportunities for manufacturing and healthcare sectors decreased over the period of time.
The figures of jobs in a department that involves medicine were at about 2.5 million in 1960. It than increased gradually, throught the period, to just above 15 millions in 2020. Similarly, the retail sector's employments started at just above the 5 million in 1960, and it also showed the gradual rise to 15 million in the next forty years, and it then remained relatively same for last 20 years.
On the other hand, the manufacturing sector's jobs showed the opposite trend, it increased initially in 1980 to 20 millions jobs, and then descreased gradually to around 13 millions empolyments in 2020. The agriculture sector jobs were at just above the 5 million in 1960, which reduced to around 3 millions in the next 20 years, and remained relatively same for the rest of the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The student covers all four sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare) and attempts a clear overview, noting the upward trends in retail and healthcare and the downward trends in manufacturing and agriculture. However, there are minor confusions in the overview itself, where the student mentions 'manufacturing and healthcare sectors decreased' when healthcare actually increased. Additionally, some data points are slightly inaccurate, such as stating that jobs in medicine started at '2.5 million' in 1960 and reached 'just above 15 millions in 2020' (the chart shows starting around 2 million and ending around 16 million). Despite these minor errors, the main features and comparisons are successfully reported.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response is logically organized with clear paragraphing, dividing the introduction, overview, and body paragraphs by sector trends. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the data, with transitional phrases like 'Overall', 'On the other hand', and 'Similarly'. However, referencing and cohesion are occasionally clumsy, such as 'It than increased gradually' and 'remained relatively same for last 20 years'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, but the overall progression could be smoother.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and paraphrasing key terms such as 'employments', 'economic sectors', and 'department that involves medicine'. However, there are noticeable word choice and spelling errors throughout the text, including 'illustates', 'thee', 'than' instead of 'then', 'throught', 'millions' pluralized incorrectly after numbers (e.g., '15 millions', '20 millions'), and 'descreased'/'empolyments'. These minor inaccuracies do not impede communication but prevent a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and comparative structures. There are several grammatical errors and typos, such as 'number of employments' (employment is uncountable here), 'It than increased', 'started at just above the 5 million', and 'remained relatively same'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while errors occur, they rarely impede communication. The control of grammar is sufficient for a competent grade.
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