Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates an yearly trend of the number of jobs in four specific sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, the line graph shows a definite increase in retail and healthcare jobs, while manufacturing and agriculture jobs show fluctuating trend.

At the start of the depicted timeline, manufacturing jobs were the most pursued sectors of the economy, with almost 15 million people employed in this sector in the year 1960, gradually increasing to nearly 20 million in 1980. Meanwhile, both retail and agriculture had about 5.2 million people in the respective sectors. However, by 1980 retail had radually increased to 10 million employees while a noticable decline is observed in the agriculture sector (around 3 million people). Lastly, healthcare sector started as quite an unpopular sector in the 1960s, with nearly 2.5 million employyes, although by 1980, the numbers had rose to a solid 5 million.

From the years 2000 to 2020, there can be seen a definite rise in both the retail and healthcare sectors, with around 15 million employees each. Conversely, a gradual decline can be noticed in both the manufacturing and agriculture industries, with almost 12.5 million and 2.5 million workers, respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The student successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting on the main trends and features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided, noting the increases in retail and healthcare alongside the fluctuations in manufacturing and agriculture. Key data points are cited accurately, such as manufacturing reaching nearly 20 million in 1980 and healthcare starting around 2.5 million. The comparisons between sectors are also handled well. However, there are minor misreadings or slightly imprecise figures, such as stating retail and agriculture had about 5.2 million in 1960 when agriculture was closer to 6 and retail also started around 6. Overall, the response fulfills the requirements of Task 1 well, earning a band 7.0.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is organized into logical paragraphs, starting with an introduction and overview, moving into the earlier time period, and finishing with the later decades. Cohesive devices are used reasonably well, with phrases like 'At the start of the depicted timeline', 'Meanwhile', 'However', and 'Conversely' guiding the reader through the data. Paragraphing is adequate, separating the introduction/overview from the body details effectively. However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly mechanical or repetitive, preventing the response from reaching higher bands. The logical progression is clear throughout, supporting a solid band 7.0 for this criterion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary for describing graphical data, using terms such as 'fluctuating trend', 'gradually increasing', 'noticable decline', and 'respective sectors'. There are some spelling errors, such as 'radually' instead of 'gradually', 'noticable' instead of 'noticeable', and 'employyes' instead of 'employees'. Less common lexical items are attempted with some awareness of style and collocation, but occasional inaccuracies and spelling lapses keep this at a band 6.0 level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating participial phrases and subordinate clauses (e.g., 'with almost 15 million people employed in this sector in the year 1960, gradually increasing to nearly 20 million'). There are a few grammatical and mechanical errors, such as 'an yearly trend' (should be 'a yearly trend') and 'the numbers had rose' (should be 'had risen'). Punctuation and sentence construction are generally sound enough to ensure that communication is not impeded, fitting the descriptors for band 6.0.

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